Former WWE superstar MVP (follow him on Twitter at @The305MVP) released a song and a video titled “Holla at the World” where the pro wrestler presumably hollas at the world. How does he do it, you ask? Well, with the help of three skanks walking under a bridge in a desolate part of town (0:17); with the help of a punk-rock white-chick bartender serving drinks to billiards-shooting bikini broads (1:24); with the help of a guy who looks like if Kanye West spent a night on the town with Matt Hardy bouncing from Cracker Barrel to Cracker Barrel (1:51); and with the help of the barely employed Carlito (3:27; yeah, hanging out with your ratty friend who only has a job thanks to his dad will help you get the women).

I don’t know who produced the beats for this song, but they sound like they were purchased from some stock bin and were made in Fruity Loops or Garage Band by a rich white kid with nothing else better to do. MVP also makes the rookie MC mistake of trying to squeeze too many god damn words into one song, like this is the only chance he’ll ever have to share the contents of his diary journal notebook rhyme collection with us. “Love the models in HOTTUBS WAIT I HAVE MORE WORDS TO SPIT OUT!” Calm down, Veep, I’m sure you’ll release another video (that you record in front of a green screen in the mall) whether we want you to or not. -Eric