"Dearest Sister, We have been through much, yet I have been spared through these great battles. I declare the South will rise, yet will be duly tested..." (See, what I'm trying to say is, he's old and would have been hand-writing letters in the Civil War...)

Well great, just as we book our hotel room for that first April weekend in Atlanta, Prowrestling.net announces that Undertaker might be out at least the rest of 2010 if not quite a ways into 2011 with a torn rotator cuff. There’s a chance he’ll be back in time for WrestleMania 27, but there’s also a chance that his old ass will crumble under a soft breeze, or Michelle McCool’s bony pelvis will crush his old-man hip in the sack and put him on the shelf for good. Look, Undertaker, vacation is vacation. When you plan to take six months off like you always do, fuck it if Rey Mysterio needs his 12th knee scope to get his frequent patient card punched, or if Big Show isn’t getting over as a babyface, or if WWE hasn’t done anything to build up main-eventers on Smackdown… stay home!! Heal up! Relax until we need you the most, which is at the event we’re all about to spend a combined, like, $5,000 on. Quit being selfish and start thinking about Stunt Granny. -Eric