Headlines: Roddy Piper’s neck, Triple H’s dreck, Kurt Angle’s… movie.

THIS is what a wrestling movie star looks like.

According to Prowrestling.net, Rowdy Roddy Piper announced on Twitter that he’ll undergo neck surgery today.

(1)I’ll try to explain. At he time I was doing Fantasy Factory And WWE Access, I BROKE MY NECK! But I didn’t know it! I knew I was Hurt, (2) I hurt all the time. I just thought the neck injury will go away. But after couple months my neck is hurting worse. No sleep from pain. (3) So I go to best Doctors in Country. When Doc saw the MRI’s he went into the 911 attitude fast. So now at 10 am. there cutting me open!

Other Tweets from Piper include:

There going to shave my hair, slash neck open, and take a chisel and hammer to my neck bones. That’s in 5 hrs.Waiting 4 God to send Locusts

There’s a bright side of geeting neck cut off. You get to wear bumless house coats. Great jello….help me out here!

Leave it to Piper to make light of such a serious situation. He’s clearly drunk.

Also according to Prowrestling.net, the newly released movie “Warrior,” featuring Kurt Angle as a Russian MMA fighter, opened at No. 3 this week, with a box office gate of $5.6 million. That figure places the film in the “failure” category. Only in entertainment can $5.6 million be considered a failure. If only I were Ric Flair, Mark Madden or Matt Hardy; then I’d be a complete success based on my income alone.

Finally, according to Prowrestling.net, Triple H’s movie “Inside Out” didn’t even break the top 50 box office list. Prowrestling.net’s Jason Powell notes that the No. 50 movie of the weekend made $20,400. At $9 a ticket, I’m guessing a movie starring Stephanie McMahon’s husband raked in exactly $18. Stick with what you know, Hunter, which is killing a crowd 20 minutes at a time instead of 90. Blecch. -Eric

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