BJ Whitmer, who spent his whole retirement fund on that Extreme Couture shirt and ripped jeans.

According to Prowrestling.net, HIV-positive former pro wrestler Andre Davis was sentenced to 32 years in prison for not telling sexual partners about his virus. Davis was sentenced in Hamilton Co., Ohio, and faces more charges in adjacent Butler and Warren counties. In Davis news, who cares? In other news, Iowa also has a Hamilton, Butler and Warren county. How about your state?

Also according to Prowrestling.net, BJ Whitmer is coming out of retirement to wrestle Jay Lethal at Ring of Honor’s February 17 event in Cincinnati, Ohio. For those of you who need a reminder, BJ Whitmer sucks balls, and no one cared that he was “retired;” we just assumed no promoter was stupid enough to book him. Of the two news stories based out of Ohio, I actually think hanger-on Whitmer is the bigger sad-sack.

Finally, according to Prowrestling.net, Shane Douglas continues to release names who will take part in the Extreme Reunion event April 28 in Philadelphia at the Pennsylvania National Guard Armory. Douglas name-dropped Sabu, Sandman and Rhino, in addition to Raven, Jerry Lynn, The Gangstas, and Tracy Smothers. I’d love to attend the show, but I already have plans to cut my pony tail off, drink a 6-pack of Keystone Light that my brother bought me, and ask a freshman high school girl out to see “10 Things I Hate About You.” And then powerbomb all of my friends through tables. Learn more about the Extreme Reunion here, thanks to Jeremy. Hmmm, you know, I kinda wanna see Andre Davis vs. BJ Whitmer in a Taipei Death Match at this show, but that’s just me. -Eric