I enjoyed some Irish beverages. Mostly one actually. I prefer to go all in on Guinness during St. Pat’s. Harp is a preferred beer too but it wasn’t an option at the bar I hit. I did enjoy an Irish Car Bomb. It was tasty. Since I’m on time and Raw is starting, let’s roll.
I’m glad CM Punk is the first one out. He needs to respond to Chris Jericho. Mitchell Cool & Jerry Lawler mention Twitter already. If you feel like playing “Where’s Waldo?” with yours truly from Smackdown last week, follow us @Stuntgranny. I just tweeted them before the start of Raw. I hadn’t watched Smackdown until last night. Jericho isn’t there so that means a sneak attack, right? Punk with the exact reaction he should have, shrug it off. Granted, his words are much better than what I can type. Chris Jericho pops on via satellite. Jericho goes fake apology. He’s soorry. Jericho goes after Punk’s sister. Punk has a destiny to drink. Jericho ended strong but his line of thinking shouldn’t affect Punk but his facial expressions are saying that they are.
Big Show is set to take on Kane when Cody Rhodes comes down to hop into the announce booth. Are they bringing more people into the booth or is that just me? Extra hype for Wrestlemania? We get a Big Show blooper reel. We are denied his mic skills so he can shadow box with gloves on. Kane with a top rope choke slam with a distraction from Cody. Cool just called it a Disaster kick. I guess they dropped “Beautiful”. Cody cuffs Big Show to the ropes. Rhodes attacks him. Big Show selling more than the beating he took. Rhodes will throw more punches at Wrestlemania.
It appears as if we’re getting a match between the captains, David Otunga with Johnny Wooden GM vs. Santino Marella. We start with a pose off. I’m loving the painted on abs for Santino. Otunga gets the win after a phone stomping. Are we going to get a match longer than a ring entrance tonight?
The Rock uses another hack location to get a crowd pop. People won’t call him on it. The Rock has some awesome short shorts on. The Rock only needs to beat John Cena to complete his ass kicking of legends. He uses another hack location to get another pop. Ah, he’s going to shove it ups Cena’s ass. I’m just not getting into the Rock. The crowd didn’t look much different than I felt. Some cheered, most looked happy that Rock was on WWE TV but knowing he’s gone after Wrestlemania.
Good crowd for Zack Ryder to talk himself on to Team Teddy. Weird that he’s taking on Daniel Bryan though. Last I saw, Ryder got his ass handed to him by Kane. Why would the World Champion be in his league? They oblige my wishes by making it a squash match. Unfortunately, why would Teddy Long pick a loser? At least Santino has a title to claim some legitimacy.
John Cena not only gets to play Superman in the ring, he get to play it in real life! A car accident, no problem. Even against the World’s Strongest Man Mark Henry. For some reason, Cena tests his power. We finally get a match longer than a ring entrance. Cena is preparing for his in ring Superman act as we go to commercial. A belly to back suplex makes the crowd go crazy. That made me laugh because it is more impressive when as he just did, his Attitude Adjustment on Henry. The Rock comes out. He Rock Bottoms Henry and leaves. Easy to pick on a beaten guy. We get replay of HHH/Shawn Michaels/Undertaker.
Kelly Kelly & Maria Menounos are yapping when Beth Phoenix & Eve Torres on the Extra set. Two stick figures versus two Amazon women. The stick figures will undoubtedly win. The Miz is lobbying for being on Team Johnny. He gets more bad luck with Sheamus as his opponent. Will this match be longer than The Miz’s promo? The Miz getting in more offense than I expected. And I think the match has exceeded promo time. Not by much. Brogue Kick. If Teddy picks up Ryder, we can have a pair of losers in that match.
Randy Orton gets welcomed to the ramp by Josh Matthews. I feel like someone is getting tossed off the ramp. I wish they’d do more promos there. No one gets tossed. Orton delivers a fine enough promo for a nothing at stake match.
R Truth & Kofi Kingston with Aksana are taking on Jack Swagger & Dolph Ziggler with Vickie Guerrero. The heels beat down Kofi. Glad Lawler made fun of Swagger’s new hair cut. R Truth goes hot tag all over my boy Dolph. He ends up getting the pin after Vickie lifts Truth’s leg off the rope. Will the ladies be in the match or just at ring side during Wrestlemania?
Shawn Michaels is the first man to come out. Good choice since he’s “neutral”. Michaels insinuates Undertaker contemplating retirement when the gong hits. Will the cowl come off this week? I’m guessing he holds off until Wrestlemania. Taker barely talks when HHH comes down. How are their careers on twin tracks? I saw Taker wrestle in the WWE before I stopped watching for about five years. HHH learned lots from HIAC and made it his play ground. Taker is Rumpelstiltskin and asks HHH if he’s going to put his kids on the line. Weird. Taker tells HHH that Michaels is better than him and walks out. Michaels has an awesome smirk when HHH looks at him. -Kevin