There’s a monster in my pants and it does a naughty dance, when it sees the light of day it makes all the people say…

From former writer and current idiot Dan Madigan:

“I get a call from Gregory Dark, the director. He says, “We’ve got a little problem here.” This call is from Australia. I said, “What’s the problem?” He goes, “Vince has a suggestion about the movie.” I said, “Well, it’s his movie.” He goes, “Vince wants this scene in the movie where Kane’s character pulls out his penis, and he wants it to be three feet long.” I thought there was a connection problem, I said “Greg, can you just back up and repeat that last line for me?” He goes, “Yes, Vince wants Kane’s penis to be three feet long, and none of the producers are saying anything about it.” So I sat there, I go, “Oh, this is not good. This is not good. This is really not good.” In the right movie, that’s genius, that’s absolutely brilliant, but not for this movie.”

You know what? And I’m being 100 percent serious here. If your boss wants something, you fucking give it to them. The correct response to that request sure as fuck wasn’t, “Oh golly gosh, this is not good!” The correct response was, “Hey Vince, why not make it four!” Because Vince is a weird guy and you have to know that going in, and it sure as shit didn’t stop you from taking the job in the first place, so if you want to be employed by him so bad, then you do what the fuck he says Dan Madigan. You make his penis three feet long if that’s what he wants. The guy is a billionaire. He has earned the right to be completely insane and you haven’t. So shut the fuck up. – Dusty