Buy Hulk Hogan’s house – a cesspool of white trash memories – for just $9.2 million

According to the Wall Street Journal by way of Gerweck.net, Hulk Hogan’s house near Tampa, Fla., is back on the market, this time for a scant $9.2 million.

Located about 35 minutes outside of Tampa on a bluff overlooking the Intracoastal Waterway and Clearwater Harbor, the 17,125-square-foot home has five bedrooms and 11 bathrooms. There’s a gym and recreation room with its own kitchen, bath and tanning room. There’s also a separate guest apartment, a pool with waterfalls and two docks.

Oh, what I wouldn’t do with 11 bathrooms. (Answer: 11 dumps in 11 days before starting at the beginning of the line again.) You may remember the Hogans placing this house on the market about five years ago for a whopping $25 million. When I failed to win the lottery, the house was taken off the market, and then posted again in 2009 for the low, low price of $10.9 million. That’s a hell of a dropoff, but Hogan definitely needs the money in light of all of this negative PR stemming from Warrior and Linda Bollea… oh wait, no one gives 11 shits what those two airheaded mongoloids have to say, because they’re obviously delusional scum. (Where’s GLAAD when you need them to correct my language?)

Now here’s an idea Hogan should steal: If you can’t sell your house, do what Fat Mike from NOFX does and rent it out! Check out the details here; it’s 3 bedrooms, 2 bathrooms and 24 cans of PBR worth of fun! The only rules: Swim in the pool, sit in the spa, use the putting green, and don’t break shit. With all of the vacationers headed to Tampa throughout the year, the Hulkster could really cash in on this one, brother. “For only $1,500 a night, you can sleep where Brooke slept with some dude, and the next night you can sleep where Brooke slept with some dude! Wanna see where, as Warrior said, Linda and I did ‘slutty things’?” Or where Nick hid out after turning his friend John into steamed broccoli? Stay on the set of ‘Hogan Knows Best,’ the show that held together the family that was destined to fall apart! House rule: Don’t run me out of Kleenex, brother, this is a rough time for me.” -Eric

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