Almost Live, Definitely Half Assed Review of WWE Raw – 16 Dec. ’19

Des Moines Civic Center in Des Moines IA. Saved from desmoinesperformingarts.org. Charles Herbert & Associates were the architects.

Seth Rollins comes out first. He’s out to remind us that he is indeed a leader. He brings out AoP as his first disciples. Rollins tells us that anything that if his orders aren’t followed, AoP is around to enforce them. Rollins tells us that he’s going to lead tonight even if people don’t like what happens. Rollins then apologizes in advance for what he’ll do.

The Viking Raiders come out. I get informed it wasn’t worth watching this match last night since it’s happening less than 24 hours later. Karl Anderson & Luke Gallows get to flap their gums about the Raiders being scared to wrestle The Club which is why everyone got counted out last night. Gallows stops a suicide dive attempt by Erik/. He then Fall Away Slams him into the barricade. Erik is having to sell more after the break. Anderson almost drops Erik on his head but he rolls through. Erik tags in Ivar. He cleans house as one does in this situation. Anderson dodges a charge and follows up with a neck breaker. Ivar comes back and connects with the hand spring back elbows. We get a second break for this match after stereo dives from the Raiders. The OC is back on the beat down of Ivar. Ivar gets the second hot tag of the match. Gallows is left to take the beating. Erik gets caught knocking Gallows off the apron. Anderson hangs him out to dry. Anderson drives Erik into his corner with an uppercut. Ivar tags in. He knocks Gallows back to the floor. He then takes too long going for a moonsault. Gallows pulls Anderson out of the ring for a miss. Magic Killer for the win. This feud is really weird. Started at a PPVt no one watched. Aired on another PPV no one watched. Now, The OC gets another non-title win over the Viking Raiders. All, ultimately to lose right? I don’t see them pulling an Undisputed Era on the main roster.

I don’t understand what is happening with Erick Rowan story. I have no idea why you’d bring something that important and fragile to the ring. There’s going to be a “payoff” at some point but can it actually payoff? I have my serious doubts. Rowan won against another local talent who tried to take said cage.

Andrade gets to complain to Charley Caruso in Spanish. Zelina Vega gets to give her a dressing down in Spanish and English. She even tells Charley to roll Andrade’s R. They’re going to beat Huberto Carrillo tonight despite their lack of winning against him recently.

Liv Morgan let her friends run her life and form her appearance. She’s been left by her friends so now she’s going to break herself to re-make herself. A rebranding seems like a good idea. I never quite got “crazy” from her anyway.

Bobby Lashley & Lana are ready to celebrate. I should learn a lesson from The Wife and just FF segments like this one. Lana asks Bobby to ask her to get married. Lashley acts like he is offended then says that he will do it. She accepts his proposal.

R Truth gets to do some talking before the big gauntlet match. The announcers have to act like him or Akira Tozawa have a chance at winning this match. Tozawa rolls up Truth to eliminate him.

Ricochet is the next man out. They get a commercial between opponents. Tozawa gets rolling early with some suicide dives. Ricochet drop kicks Tozawa coming off the top rope. Ricochet starts to wear down Tozawa. Ricochet face plants Tozawa from his back. Tozawa reverses into his own submission. A series of counters leads to Tozawa making a pin on a Bridging German Suplex. Ricochet makes his second come back. Tozawa takes too much time going for the top rope senton. Recoil for the win.

Matt Hardy is the next man up. Hardy puts up more of a fight than I expect to happen. Ricochet gets caught going for a spring board. Side Effect by Hardy for a near fall. Hardy misses a moonsault. Ricochet gets a near fall on a standing moonsault. Ricochet rolls through on a Twist of Fate attempt for another elimination.

Humberto Carrillo is next out of the back stage area. He gets to work on his ground game more than any other match that he has been in so far. Ricochet gives Carrillo a DVD for a break in momentum. Zelina Vega came out to the ramp to watch the match. Ricochet gets a second near fall froma standing moonsault. Carrillo dodges a pump kick. He gets a near fal with a drop kick to the back of Ricochet. They trade kicks and forearms. Ricochet charges and takes both of them to the floor. They start trading blows as Carrillo sits on the top rope. Ricochet wins the battle and gets in a Superplex. Ricochet goes to the top but Carrillo stops him. It takes a spring board spinning kick followed with a moonsault for Carrillo to win.

Andrade’s music hits. Carrillo looks to Vega on the ramp. Andrade attacks from behind. Andrade sustains the assault. Hammer Lock DDT on the concrete by Andrade. I guess it’s a DQ. Rey Mysterio comes out to save Carrillo. Andrade and Zelina leave thorugh the crowd.

Rey is still by ring side when Seth Rollins & AoP come out. They attack Rey. Seth then mockingly gives him the lead pipe. Akam stops from grabbing it and attacks again. Rollins & AoP make like they’re leaving then Rollins comes back into the ring to Stomp him.

Charley wonders why Rey Mysterio was attacked. He needs to keep order. The main point of the interview is to challenge Rey Mysterio for the United States Title.

We get recap of the Kabuki Warriors winning at TLC. Asuka is in a singles match against Deonna Purrazzo. She pump kicks Asuka out of the ring to start the match. Asuka took over for the part of the match not televised. Purrazzo gets a chance with her arm bar. Asuka takes control again though. Asuka locks in a chain of submission holds. Asuka gives her the mini -PK kicks. Asuka Lock for the tap out victory.

Becky Lynch is doing a sit down with Carley Caruso. Lynch feels like the WWE is protecting her to get more money out of the golden goose. She thinks that Asuka is the next in line to challenge for the championship. She wants to prove something to herself since she hasn’t been able to beat Asuka previously.

Randy Orton comes out.

Rey Mysterio has to fight two men at once. He warns Andrade about trying to end people’s careers. Rey then accepts Rollins challenge. Rollins lost Rey’s respect for the way he has handled things recently.

AJ Styles didn’t have to wait around in the ring before the match. Styles locks in a Calf Crusher early in the match. Styles starts working over the leg after Orton gets out of the submission. Orton finally turns things around with a hanging DDT. Styles reverses an RKO into a Calf Crusher. Orton gets out. Styles fakes a Flying Forearm. Orton RKOs him on the second attempt. The OC attacks after the match. The Viking Raiders try to make the save but get beat down also. The OC stands tall.

Kevin DiFrango

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