Almost Live, Definitely Half Assed Review of WWE Smackdown

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Dean Ambrose starts off the show talking about how he wanted to get Chris Jericho back for destroying Mitch The plant. The lights go out. Jericho attacks from behind. He puts a straight jacket on Ambrose. What’s that smell? Is that the smell of a stipulation for Extreme Rules? Jericho then attacks a mostly defenseless Ambrose. The referees save Ambrose.

Kalisto is on the head set. Sin Cara is in the ring. Lana introduces Rusev. This all seems somewhat familiar. Here’s to hoping the outcome is vastly different. Mauro Ranallo pulled out a Leicester City and Steph Curry references in the first part of the match. Sin Cara gets some momentum. Lana stops it by throwing water on Kalisto. It distracts Sin Cara long enough for Rusev to get the upper hand again. The Accolade for the win. That win isn’t exactly a ringing endorsement.

Dana Brooke gives one of her best promos I have seen from her but they can’t have her beat Becky Lynch, can they? The WWE will give us the answer quickly because the match is next. Emma is at ring side. Brooke did get the win after Emma poked Lynch in the “inured” eye. They did what they could with the time they were allotted.

AJ Styles, Karl Anderson & Luke Gallows all agree that they like each other. Anderson & Gallows need to have real speaking roles at some point.

New Day cuts one of their more entertaining promos of recent. Their tournament didn’t give them much material to work with, to be fair. Big E keeps trying to step over the PG line but Xavier Woods & Kofi Kingston stop him. The Vaudevillains interrupt them when the New Day goes for their tag line.

Kofi Kingston is taking on Aiden English. Kingston baseball slides out of the ring. Englsih allows him to slide through and tosses Kingston into the post. English comes charging into the corner and gets pendulum kicked. Kingston gets the momentum. Gotch tries to come into the ring. Big E & Woods pull him out of the ring. They all get tossed. Kofi rolls up English, who reverses into the corner for a pin. English grabs the rope for the aided victory.

Roman Reigns and the Usos share blood so they agree that they all like each other too.

The Usos took on The Club. I just sat back and relaxed for the match. It was very good as should be expected out of these participants. It ended twice, both DQs for The Club when they attacked the Usos on the outside. The second attack ended with chairs being slammed against Uso backs.

I’m already tired of the Bob Backlund and Darren Young skits.

R Truth & Tyler Breeze are taking on Goldust & Fandango. I’m about as excited about this match as the skit above. Breeze & Fandango turn on their partners. Breeze gets the pin on Truth. Fandango & Breeze attack Goldust & R Truth after the match.

Charlotte & Ric Flair are upset about his man handling on Raw. Flair defends Charlotte but she didn’t exactly seem excited about his endorsement.

Sami Zayn & Cesaro are taking on The Miz & Kevin Owens in the main event. I sat back and watched this match too. I liked the story they told to start the match that Owens & The Miz still weren’t on the same page. After taking a beating, they worked together to work over the smaller baby face aka Zayn. Cesaro gets the hot tag in. He starts to clean house. The Miz comes in so Zayn comes in also. The end result is Zayn accidently Heluva Kicking Cesaro. Owens follows it up with the Bull Frog Splash for the win. I will so need to edit this after sleep. – Kevin

 

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