Lance Hoyt WWE Bound?

A tramp stamp on a guy is totally marketable.

A tramp stamp on a guy is totally marketable.

Hell yes. You know when life gets you down it’s also bound to come around and make you happy again; right? Well, it’s happened. According to, Lance Hoyt is WE bound. I cannot express the inner turmoil of mine that has finally been laid to rest. It has been too long since WWE introduced a big man with no discernible talent and forced him down our throats. Now, no my friends this long nightmare is over. Lance Hoyt is WWE bound.  God damnit Hoyt is WWE bound.

Yeah, this was really only a matter of time. Hoyt is a tall guy with some muscles. (Say it like Popeye for comedic effect.) There actually may be something there for WWE to work with but this is definitely “don’t hold your breath” territory.  It’s more than likely he’ll be cast in the Diesel role and from there go the route of Mr. Hughes; minus the kickass sunglasses and gloves. -Jeremy

4 Responses to “Lance Hoyt WWE Bound?”

  1. Fanatic 2009-04-27 at 7:39 pm #

    If he doesn’t bring Christy Hemme with him backstage to his first tv appearence Batista will be throwing him back out the door. Actually, if he does bring Christy Hemme with, Batista will still throw HIM out the door.

  2. Kirk 2009-04-28 at 1:11 am #

    Nah, Batista can’t throw anyone out the door. He’d have to walk them toward the door, stopping every step to put them in a rest hold for 70 seconds or risk tearing something.

  3. Fanatic 2009-04-28 at 11:54 am #

    Next to Big Show last night he looked like the pinnacle of physical fitness. Give the guy a great, he has ashtma.

    They need to bring in Road Dogg and call Hoyt “The NEW Double J” and he could still use his guitar hero stuff.

  4. Kirk 2009-04-28 at 1:10 pm #

    Oh, man. It would be awesome if Hoyt really is brought in as “the real new Double J”, Jenna Jameson. And he proceeds to talk about how he gave the Road Dogg all of his charisma.

    Great trainwreck appeal.

    Knowing WWE though, he’ll debut on ECW with some horrible name like Beauford Trapper or Lars Tamzarian, and get canned in six weeks.

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