Steve's fist was coming at my head like this...

Snap (Stallone’s Neck) – Steve Austin decided to go a little too far while filming a fight scene for the movie “The Expendables” with Sylvester Stallone and broke his neck. It’s only a hairline fracture which I suppose is good. I recovered from a hairline fracture in about a month. Granted it was in my wrist from jerking off. Stallone’s got way better doctors than me (wink, wink, nudge, nudge) so it could happen. If not, he’s a big pussy.

Crackle (From Bubba’s Microphone) – Bubba The Love Sponge, who didn’t get to the bottom of the attackers last night, is pissed on two fronts. Large swaths of his Army didn’t get into The iMPACT! Zone last night after he guaranteed they’d get in. Evidently like much of America, Bubba hasn’t watched TNA because he should know that the building only seats 1500 people so his Army alone would have packed the joint. Bubba also said that the backstage area was unorganized and chaotic. What did he expect from a show that constantly is unorganized and chaotic? Oh that’s right, he was sucking on Hogan’s teet for too long to watch any of iMPACT!

Don't the Bella Twins make you miss me already?

Pop (Goes Melina’s Knee) – Melina had surgery to repair her torn left ACL. Even Dr. James Andrews realized she was a terrible babyface.

Thanks to Prowrestling.net for Snap, Crackle (Part 1 & 2) and Pop.