Almost Live, Definitely Half Assed Review of WWE Raw – 28 September 2015

Saved from darwinmartinhouse.org. Picture by Bernhard Wagner of Fotografix.

The Darwin Martin House in Buffalo, NY. Saved from darwinmartinhouse.org. Picture by Bernhard Wagner of Fotografix.

The WWE already saved me five minutes by recapping the Kane silliness and starting the show off with John Cena who always has a medium length entrance. New Day answers his US Title challenge. They are as entertaining as ever doing a Cena entrance music remake, giving Cena a new slogan “Hustle, Loyalty & Booty” and . Cena tells them to stop entertaining and get in the ring. Xavier Woods is the challenger. Big E & Kofi get booted to the back early. This really should be a squash match. Woods isn’t even taken seriously in his own group. Cena misses a top rope cross body to make this thing interesting for a moment. Woods connects with “Eat The Feet” but only gets two. Cena locks in the STF. Big E & Kofi come in and attack. The Dudley Boyz even the odds.

We now have a six man tag match. I would like to say that Woods acquitted himself well in singles action. They did a good job laying out the match to showcase him without being unrealistic. Big E gets to take it to John Cena. Devon gets an early hot tag. He takes on the also rested Kofi. Bubba comes in and keeps taking it to Kofi. He takes the head butt. Woods yanks Bubba away from a 3D. Kofi hits a distracted Devon with Trouble in Paradise for the win.

Stephanie & HHH are talking to Ashley from HR. She is there to help the Authority. Ashley will be following Kane around tonight. Seth Rollins comes in an blames himself for getting Kane in trouble. Dean Ambrose is talking to Roman Reigns. Ambrose wants to be at ring side for his match. Randy Orton would help. Speak of the devil, he shows up. Orton says Reigns has tonight to finish business, because then it’s open season on the Wyatts.

Mark Henry gets to lose to Big Show so that he continues to look good going into the show down with Brock Lesnar. Henry takes the WMD like a champ.

The Miz gives us more recap that I blow through. Becky Lynch & Charlotte are his guests. Lynch gets to verbally berate Miz for being sexist. Charlotte challenges Paige. Team Bella comes out and rub Charlotte’s problems in her face. Nikki tries to claim that she started the Revolution. Charlotte goes populist and saying it’s not about us and it’s about people investing in the Divas. Paige comes out and mentions that she put the NXT Divas on the map and started the Revolution. Team PCB still kicks the Bellas asses.

We have a six Diva match after the break. Brie is taking a beating from Charlotte & Becky. Alicia Fox clocks Lynch to gain the advantage. Byron Saxton is the first person to bring up Paige’s history of her family in wrestling much like Charlotte’s. Lynch gets worked over by Team Bella. Charlotte gets the hot tag much to Paige’s chagrin. I smell a finish. Charlotte gets kicked into Paige, who leaves ring side. Natalya comes down to help out but Paige yanks her off the apron. Charlotte is distracted. Rack Attack for the win.

Seth Rollins is talking to Ashley. He is of course ratting on Kane. Kane is holding a big red present as he compliments Rollins. They try to have a Seven moment. They do have the bronze head of the Rollins statue. Ashely thinks it’s considerate. Rollins is weirded out and leaves.

The Prime Time Players are taking on Luke Harper & Braun Strowman. Harper is a step ahead of Darren Young. Strowman gets to toss Young around the outside. Titus O’Neil gets to run through Harper. Strowman distracts O’Neil. Harper super kicks O’Neil. Young breaks up a cover. O’Neil tries to save him but gets clotheslined by Harper. Strowman gets him to pass out in the modified bear hug.

Stardust is taking on Neville for more times than I care to count already. I have no idea why they’re stressing Stardust being Cody Rhodes. Neville fights out of the Tree of Woe. Neville goes for the Red Arrow when King Barrett shows up. Stardust shoves Neville into a Bull Hammer for the DQ. He gives another one to Stardust. Looks like they may be playing him serious. I still think he deserves a shot.

Seth Rollins and Kane have dueling video packages of why the other is more crazy. To make the story line more fun, Ashley agrees that Kane is the better employee and that Rollins needs to undergo evaluation. Rollins attacks Kane. He Pedigrees him. Rollins then beats him down with a chair. Rollins does the old chair in the ankle stomp. Rollins berates Kane as he’s carted to the back. The ambulance lights up red. Kane emerges in his “Demon” garb and proceeds to kick Rollins ass. Rollins flees to the back before he can be Tombstoned. Campy isn’t even an apt description of what just happened.

Bray Wyatt has a pretty focused promo about wanting to kick Roman Reigns ass one on one.

Bo Dallas gets to make fun of the 2-1 Bills for not having a Super Bowl. Randy Orton gets to whoop on him in front of said Bills players. RKO in short order.

Ryback is on the head set. Kevin Owens is taking on Rusev still with Summer Rae. Ryback gets to run down Owens because of his weight. They both end up attacking Ryback. Dolph Ziggler makes the save.

Paul Heyman gets to do some talking about the Big Show. Heyman builds up and tears down Big Show all in one promo. Big Show comes down and takes up verbally for himself. Good stuff. Still not a chance in hell he wins at MSG.

Roman Reigns and Bray Wyatt are having a nice feud ending match when they had an expected double count out because this feud should not end on a Raw.  They proceed to have a spectacle off when Bray Wyatt drives Roman Reigns through a barricade with his flying crossbody. Wyatt starts to gloat on the announce table when he’s speared by Reigns through the table. Needless to say, the crowd was wild. Fun ending. – Kevin

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