Stunt Granny Big 11, Week Ending 9/24/11

Posted on September 25, 2011 by stuntgranny

1. The Rock and John Cena - Between Rock’s Tweets and WWE.com’s news, word has leaked that the Rock and John Cena, in the midst of their blood feud, will be on the same team in a 5-on-5 elimination match at Survivor Series. Fantasy booking: Rock wants to “prove his leadership” (but really wants to make an ass out of Cena) and drafts team members Santino Marella, Zack Ryder and Hacksaw Jim Duggan, causing an all-star team of Alberto, Dolph, Swagger, McIntyre and a returning-as-a-heel-to-Raw Mason Ryan to line up as opposition. Rock is so out of touch, though, that he doesn’t know Santino and Ryder are capable of victory, slightly evening the odds. But when it comes down to Rock and Cena vs. Alberto, Dolph and Swagger, Rock leaves Cena lying. The biggest surprise: Cena loses. Print the money. - Eric

2. Dolph Ziggler - Dolph got a lot of press (Huffington Post, Yahoo News) for the alleged “hairline mandibular fracture” he suffered at the right hand of actor Hugh Jackman. Fake or real, WWE is in the news. Too bad the wrestler in the spotlight has a stupid name. - Eric

 
3. The Muppets - Jim Henson’s foamy creations will guest host WWE Monday Night Raw on October 31. OK, sorry, I didn’t think the phrase “Jim Henson’s foamy creations” would turn my childhood memories so awkwardly pornographic. - Eric

4. Mark Henry – The man is on a roll right now. He’s never going to be a 5 star technician but his mic work is second to maybe CM Punk currently and he’s playing the monster heel role to a tee. Let’s just hope he wins at Hell In A Cell to keep his beast mode going a bit longer. - Kevin

5. The Miz & R Truth – They’ve been talking conspiracy and HHH was all too kind to play right into their hands after they lost to CM Punk & John Cena by firing them. The WWE is doing a good job right now of getting their name out there in the press starting with CM Punk & HHH having a tiff at the San Diego Comic Con. Next up was Ziggler getting press as Eric noted. Now the “fired” duo of Miz & Truth get a show on SiriusXM. Smart move on their part to keep the names of those “quit” or “fired” on the minds of wrestling fans. - Kevin

6. What TNA Did Right This Week – For a change, Vince Russo didn’t write in a break up of Beer Money even though Bobby Roode has a shot at Kurt Angle for Bound For Glory. James Storm, the better of the duo in my opinion, is going to get stuck teaching a very green Gunner the ropes while Angle & Roode duke it out. TNA helped build up Roode as a contender and didn’t have Storm look like a chump when he wrestled Angle this week. - Kevin

7. Kurt Angle - Has this guy totally stopped lifting weights? After watching Impact he firmly falls into the “guy in your neighborhood you reluctantly wave hello to” category instead of their champion. It is impossible to take him seriously as an athlete with his jaundice look.  – Jeremy

8. ROH - They started their broadcasting days through Sinclair Saturday night. There were actually commercials for the show during ESPN on ABC’s college football game. This is more advertising in one night than through the entire history of the company. - Jeremy

9. WWE Network – Observe this:

WWE has sent out a survey today polling about ideas for the WWE Network. The direction they are talking about is it would be a monthly pay network, similar to HBO or Showtime, priced at between $7 and $12 per month. The fee would be part of a package that would include a number of stations including the NFL Network, NBA Network and Fuel TV (which will have a heavy dose of UFC live preliminary coverage next year).

It would offer 24 hours of programming, including new WWE produced shows that aren’t wrestling shows, repeats of both Raw and Smackdown, old footage, two nights of first-run live wrestling programming and a daily news show.

The biggest surprise is that WWE would apparently keep only the “B” shows on PPV, and would make WrestleMania, SummerSlam, Royal Rumble and Survivor Series exclusive to network subscribers and no longer offer them on PPV.

If they were to actually make that move, since they would be part of tiered programming and would only get a minimal part of that $7 to $12 fee, and certainly not nearly what the NFL or NBA would get, they would be giving up more than $25 million that the company earned in PPV revenue from Mania alone this year. That’s not throwing in revenue from the other three big events which may do another $20 million combined, perhaps more this year due to an expected upturn in Survivor Series.

The economics of the move on paper don’t make sense other than the company must feel it needs to have something so big to get enough carriages of the network coming out of the blocks.

Doing so would also likely kill the “B” PPV concept, because the people who are interested in PPVs would feel like they were getting the big ones for free, and be less apt to pay $44.95 for secondary shows.

In related news, WWE issued a second press release recently simply stating, “We have a bad idea.” – Dusty

10. Big Show – Another press release, ostensibly about a possible WWE Network show:

“How do you handle a hungry man? Just ask Bess Wight. Her husband is Paul “The Big Show” Wight, WWE Superstar and the world’s largest athlete! “Show” is seven feet tall and 425 pounds. Bess is bodacious, beautiful, and one big time cook! And if you think The Big Show is tough, you haven’t met his wife! Bess and Show are about to give viewers an all-access pass into the controlled chaos that is their kitchen. You’ll meet their friends, their families, and even some of Big Show’s fellow WWE Superstars – you never know who will stop by their house to whip up something delicious! Once you see this larger than life couple in the kitchen, we know you’ll be hungry for more!”

Isn’t it funny how much Big Show eats? He eats a lot!!! – Dusty

11. UFC 135 – I don’t give a flip if this isn’t wrestling related. I saw the show, and holy geez was it awesome. UFC is pro wrestling done right. From the personalities to the interviews to the video packages, everything is right about UFC right now. My boys Nate Diaz and Josh Koscheck were victorious, and Bones Jones surprised me by beating Rampage. He’s the real deal. – Dusty

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Headlines: Batista Tweets about Melina, Ziggler fractures jaw, Vince McMahon goes shit-house

Posted on September 21, 2011 by stuntgranny

And then he'll have this for dessert.

According to Prowrestling.net, Batista recently Tweeted that he’s not interested in returning to wrestling and that he would entertain an offer from MMA outfit Bellator. The more interesting part of his Tweet, which just sounds kinda thrown in both in and out of context, reads:

I have no idea why WWE released their hottest Diva.

Batista is surely referring to Melina, whom he used to bang on the side when his wife had cancer and when Melina was dating current holder of the deed to the doghouse, John Morrison. What does this ultimately mean? Batista is the man, Melina is a slut, and John Morrison is a skinny punk-ass bitch who needs to cut his losses and get on with life instead of being Matt Hardy with abs. I guarantee if Morrison ever saw Batista walk around a corner, Morrison would use that stupid Parkour shit to run up the wall, but then he’d have a real eagle-eye view of Batista doing whatever he wants with his own sloppy seconds.

Also according to Prowrestling.net, Dolph Ziggler suffered a hairline mandibular fracture this past Monday on Raw, but it sounds like he won’t miss much time, if any. For those of you who weren’t alive to see Mick Foley wrestle as Mankind, “mandible” is another word for jaw. Ziggler’s opponent on Monday, Zack Ryder, isn’t exactly a stiff worker, but Ziggler did take a punch to the face from actor Hugh Jackman. Or as Tracy Morgan calls him, “Jack Human.” (Click ahead to 5:40)

Finally, according to Prowrestling.net, Vince McMahon yelled at Alberto del Rio and Comic Book Guy Writer #482 backstage after del Rio mentioned Vince McMahon by name on Monday Night Raw. McMahon seems totally bi-polar (a really important attribute for a chairman and CEO) and could have easily spun around 180 degrees and kissed a Make-A-Wish kid on the head and asked butterflies to braid a retarded girl’s hair, then gone right back to berating del Rio. In fact, I’m positive he could do that, and I’d pay money to see it. There you go, Vince, book that exact segment for the December PPV and you’ve got yourself an extra buy. -Eric

Filed under: Misc. News, WWE News | Tagged: , , , , , , , , , , , | 1 Comment »

Kevin’s Blog: Definitely Live & Half Assed Review of Raw

Posted on September 19, 2011 by stuntgranny

I was forgetful last night.

I was so excited about the Night of Champions pay per view that I took the time to do a preview of the show. I even arranged my night so that I could purchase the pay per view. My neighbors and friends being around during the first hour or so didn’t allow me to blog about it although both Jeremy and I used Twitter (@Stuntgranny) as a vehicle for our thoughts. My biggest mistake though was something that we came up with a long time ago, when the pay per view looks strong, it’s going to be terrible. When a pay per view card looks weak, it’s going to be awesome. Money In The Bank was one of the few pay per views that didn’t fall into this category but it may have been elevated by the Punk vs. Cena match and ending. I will air my disagreements with most of the commentary I have read today during the blog. Let’s roll.

We got started with a short promo by Punk that got cut short by HHH. Trips gives us a triple threat Hell In A Cell match between Punk, Cena and Del Rio. They need to get to work on selling the pay per view in two weeks so good on them. Punk making a good point about HHH not being in on the conspiracy. Johnny Ace gets to bore us to death. HHH promises to fire someone by the end of the nice after Johnny is told about the conspiracy. JR gets an interview with Mark Henry. (NOC reaction: A lot of people bagged on HHH going over. I doubt we’ve seen the end of the feud as I’ve stated several times already. I am starting to wonder why I feel the need to give the WWE more rope with this angle and some of the other ones recently. I’m being overly optimistic with their recent track record. I’m unsure if it’s because I want to rage against the machine which at this point to me is other internet fans. I do see some change happening though like Ryder, Sheamus, Punk and hopefully more of Beth Phoenix.)

8 Man Tag match – I’d take it we’re getting this jamb all of these contestants together because no new feuds will develop in time for HIAC. Nice touch of Sheamus finishing Otunga in front of Christian. HHH talks to the referee (and uses a name) but wants the Miz & R Truth to talk to him. Del Rio complains. (NOC reaction: I can’t believe people complained about Del Rio dropping the title. He got very little reaction at the Raw I attended recently. He wasn’t exactly impressive when he just talked to HHH. As noted in my preview, which Money In The Bank winner had a long first title break? Plus, if Cena makes the WWE money and people are clicking off this rich snooze, why should he be champion?)

Del Rio takes on John Morrison. Wow, I check Twitter and Del Rio wins in no time flat. Hugh Jackman add. This sucks that I’ll be taping something during this whole Raw so I can’t flip to the game. I can’t wait to watch some Hawaii Five-O later though.

(more…)

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Kevin’s Blog: Definitely Live & Half Assed Review of Raw

Posted on September 12, 2011 by stuntgranny

I enjoyed Raw last week. That pug is definitely enjoying something.

I was surprised at how much people disliked Raw last week. I never ended up getting to talk about my thoughts of the show since we talked about the ancillary happenings around the show. If Nash did not pass a physical test, then the WWE had to make a serious adjustment to the storyline. I doubt we get a clean finish between HHH and Punk because they’ve had to speed up this storyline so I’ll wait to see what they pull off. I feel like I need to give the WWE the benefit of the doubt here recently because they have stepped up and given a lot of people chances and bigger pushes. One of these competitors is Zach Ryder, who had a slew of signs last week and got his first video package that had Z! True Long Island Story. They’re also pushing the Divas of Doom and giving the ladies a little more ring time. Sure, the tag team push might just be a fad but again, let’s see them out. Change isn’t going to happen over night.  If I remember anything else, I’ll try to add it into the commentary. Let’s roll, pretty much on time.

After a promo that almost put me to sleep by Del Rio, Bret Hart does get a big response but Cole correctly points out that they’re in Canada. His sunglasses are awful. They’re riding too high on his face. They look like they’re trying to cut out the glare coming off of his forehead. Hart is stumbling all over the place as usual. Illegal Canadians got a chuckle out of me. Cena is playing down to the competition again in the promo department. I’m shocked, all that jockeying set up a tag team match. (That’s sarcasm.) Cody vs. Randy was good on Smackdown. I don’t need to watch it again. Oh, check out of Twitter (@Stuntgranny) for random things like me getting entirely too drunk on a Sunday, waking up at 1 AM then finally Smackdown and doing a review. Not a good day all around. Nothing quite like hitting on a lesbian.

(more…)

Filed under: Kevin's Blog, TV Recaps, WWE News | Tagged: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a Comment »

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