Almost Live, Definitely Half Assed Review of WWE Raw – 19 October 2015

Meyerson Symphony Center designed by I.M. Pei in Dallas Texas. From

Meyerson Symphony Center designed by I.M. Pei in Dallas Texas. From

“Stone Cold” Steve Austin starts the show. Who’s going to complain online if he goes for another predictable 15 minute opening segment? He keeps it short so that Undertaker can take his sweet ass time getting to the ring like normal. I’m not completely sure what Undertaker just threatened Brock Lesnar with exactly. He shows up with Paul Heyman shortly there after. Heyman talks about both men being consumed with revenge. He said that Taker’s reason is revenge for losing the Streak. Taker says that he has nothing to lose now because the Streak was taken away from him. Brock teases a confrontation. (Next Day Note: This segment served it’s purpose but anything that involves Taker speaking is passable at best.)

John Cena & The Dudley Boyz are taking on New Day. Of course they get the mic on the way to the ring. I can’t sum that one up better than them dancing around with a unicorn horn. Wow, that was hilarious. Even Ken got a kick out them. The match is in first gear when they break. New Day is beating down Cena. Big E does too much showing off but Cena only delays the beating he is taking. Cena rolls away from the splash. Devon gets in. I don’t know when Devon started doing the Ron Simmons spine buster, but it still looks brutal. Devon gets distracted. Xavier Woods rolls him up, grabs the tights and gets three. The Dudleyz attack Kofi & Big E. Cena ends up AAing Woods. The Dudleyz end ups power bombing Woods through a table. I always love when the WWE has to get rumors for their own company. This time about Randy Orton being injured again by the Wyatt Family. (Next Day Note: Because Ken & The Lady were around, it wasn’t the best coverage. This segment was by far the worst.)

Dean Ambrose had something to say about the Wyatt Family taking out Orton and that he was going to keep fighting. Because we all know some other partner will get assigned to him (Next Day Note: Now if I was paying attention, I would have called on Reigns being his partner and that there was no need to build up a “mystery” partner.) Sasha Banks & Naomi are taking on Nikki Bella & Alicia Fox. Naturally, Tamina & Brie Bella are at ring side. Team BAD  is beating down Alicia as we get another break. Michael Cole has said Bella’s Evolution several time during this match so that must be a new theme that’s getting hammered home. Naomi misses a charge in the corner. Nikki takes advantage and gives her the Rack Attack for the win.

Shawn Michaels comes out. The Lady is mad that he ate the kids food. She wants Michaels to pay the parents back. Seth Rollins interrupts the boring promo Michaels was giving. Rollins is mad that he wasn’t talking about Seth “Freakin'” Rollins. Michaels said he was too busy becoming the best to talk as much as Rollins. Seth throws a fit and leaves but can’t get his music so he sticks around. Michaels ends up assigning him a match against Ryback…next.

Rollins is taking on Ryback. Ryback uses his power to get the upper hand early. I think Rollins low blows Ryback. Rollins Pedigrees Ryback for the win. They said Rollins had been working over the mid section. You could have fooled me.

We haven’t had enough tag team matches tonight so we get Dolph Ziggler, Cesaro & Neville teaming against King Barrett, Rusev & Sheamus. Neville ends up starting against Rusev which seems like a terrible idea. The crowd chants “USA” while an Englishman and Bulgarian are in the ring. Neville is taking the beat down. Cesaro ends up getting the hot tag. Ziggler gets the second hot tag. Ziggler gets a few pin falls before everyone gets their finisher spot. Sheamus Brogue Kicks Ziggler as he hangs on the ropes. Barrett covers him for the win.

Ric Flair is in the ring. We stopped coverage to watch the Star Wars trailer. It was so worth it. For some reason, he introduces Roman Reigns as Dean Ambrose’s partner. Wasn’t that a no brainer? He invites Bray Wyatt into the ring to have a face to face in chairs. Wyatt accepts and listens to what Reigns has to say. Reigns knows that Wyatt is scared and will have his goons attack him. Reigns attacks Wyatt unprovoked. Evidently Erick Rowan is back in the Family. Good plan for him. Backstage, Shawn Michaels talks Seth Rollins into teaming with Dean Ambrose & Roman Reigns against the Wyatt Family while HHH & Stephanie stand by flabbergasted.

Charlotte is taking on Brie Bella. Hey, a singles match for the Divas! Brie is doing a good job of working over Charlotte. She ends up stopping Brie’s imitation Daniel Bryan kicks. Charlotte hits the spear. She slaps on the Figure 8 for a quick tap out. Clean finish to boot. Renee Young talks to Paige back stage. She questions if Paige attacked Natalya back stage on Smackdown. Paige says we’re going to see where this story goes. Paige runs down Renee as a sub standard Erin Andrews.

Kevin Owens get to beat Mark Henry. The IC Belt found a home in my opinion. He’s getting some big wins even if Henry is pretty low on the totem pole these days. Owens tries to pound away but fails. Henry misses a splash. Owens connects with the senton. Henry yells at Owens that he’s been the bully for nineteen years. Henry is a champ for taking the Pop Up Power Bomb. Ryback comes out as Owens berates Henry. Ryback is fed Owens. He power bombs Owens. Renee Young allows Seth Rollins to talk about his greatness more.

Roman Reigns & Dean Ambrose get to come out before Seth Rollins. Reigns & Ambrose are not impressed. Luke Harper is absent from the Wyatt Family. Rollins ends up starting against Erick Rowan. Except he quickly tags out to Reigns. There was posturing but not much happened before the break. Ambrose end sup taking the beat down for the baby faces. Reigns gets taken off the apron roughly by Braun Strowman. Rollins acts like he wants the tag. Rollins pretends like he hurt his knee jumping on the apron. Ambrose nails the sling shot clothes line. Reigns tags in. Superman Punch to Strowman. Reigns beats down Rowan. Superman Punch on Rowan. Strowman breaks up the pin. Strowman ends up bear hugging Reigns out. Ambrose attacks with a kendo stick for the DQ. The Wyatts beat down Ambrose on the outside. Reigns nails an over the top rope dive. Wyatt gets rolled back inside. Spear on Wyatt. Rowan gets speared for good measure. He is so losing on Sunday. – Kevin

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