Well, out of the millions of choices at WrestleMania IV, the best match honors go to the WWF Championship tournament finals, Randy Savage vs. Ted DiBiase, and one of the preliminary round matches, Jake Roberts vs. Rick Rude (which I can’t readily find on YouTube, and that’s OK with me, because I skip past that snoozefest every time). Check out hot-ass Elizabeth in the videos above!
We here at Stunt Granny are suckers for nostalgia, so when we think of Survivor Series, we don’t think of some queefy triple threat match with John Cena, CM Punk and Ryback. We hearken back to the days when teams of five (or four) strive to survive! You know, hence the name of the event. At its inception, the Survivor Series pay-per-view was composed of elimination matches, with the goal of survival at the expense of the entire opposing team. Then they started fucking with the format, and now it’s a bunch of singles matches, with the token bone thrown at us older fans of one, maybe two elimination matches.
Well screw you, WWE, we’ve compiled a list of the top 10 Survivor Series elimination matches of all time! We’ve scoured YouTube for copyright infringers (them, not us) and found most of these matches for your viewing pleasure. If you find one that we couldn’t, leave the link in a comment and we’ll post it. (Don’t rip it and upload yourself; remember, we’re not the ones breaking the law )
Side note: How was the 1989 event so damn good?? The worst match featured the top draw and two of the best workers of all time!
1988 Powers of Pain & Rockers & Hart Foundation & British Bulldogs & Young Stallions
vs.
Demolition & Brain Busters & Bolsheviks & Fabulous Rougeaus & Conquistadors
1989 Ultimate Warrior & Jim Neidhart & Shawn Michaels & Marty Jannetty
vs.
Andre the Giant & Arn Anderson & Haku & Bobby “The Brain” Heenan
Macho King Randy Savage & Earthquake & Dino Bravo & Greg Valentine
vs.
Hacksaw Jim Duggan & Bret Hart & Ronnie Garvin & Hercules
Dusty Rhodes & Brutus Beefcake & Red Rooster & Tito Santana
vs.
Big Boss Man, Bad News Brown, Rick Martel and Honky Tonk Man
Rick Rude & Mr. Perfect & Fabulous Rougeaus
vs.
Roddy Piper & Jimmy Snuka & Bushwhackers
1991 Ric Flair, The Mountie, Ted DiBiase, & Warlord
vs.
Roddy Piper, Bret Hart, Virgil, & Davey Boy Smith
1993 Marty Jannetty, Randy Savage, Razor Ramon, & The 1-2-3 Kid
vs.
Irwin R. Schyster, Diesel, Rick Martel, & Adam Bomb
1994 Razor Ramon & 1-2-3 Kid & Davey Boy Smith & Headshrinkers (Fatu & Sionne)
vs.
Shawn Michaels & Diesel & Owen Hart & Jim Neidhart & Jeff Jarrett
1995 Shawn Michaels & Ahmed Johnson & Davey Boy Smith & Psycho Sid
vs.
Yokozuna & Owen Hart & Razor Ramon & Dean Douglas
2001 The Rock & Chris Jericho & Undertaker & Kane & Big Show
vs.
Steve Austin & Kurt Angle & Booker T & Rob Van Dam & Shane McMahon
2003 Randy Orton & Chris Jericho & Christian & Scott Steiner & Mark Henry
vs.
Shawn Michaels & Rob Van Dam & Booker T & Bubba & D-Von Dudley
Just in case like myself, you like to disconnect from the internet from time to time, especially on the weekends, here’s a small review of what huge, gigantic, spectacular, who am I kidding, mundane news came across the internet.
According to Prowrestling.net, Bill DeMott has become head trainer for WWE developmental. One would think it’d be great to keep your head trainer on TV with Tough Enough that most of the wrestling community liked, unlike the WWE’s current on air product. From what they’ve shown on TV, he looks like a good trainer so good luck to him and his trainees.
Also from our favorite source of news, Degeneration X will be making an appearance on the 1000th, 3 hour Raw. I feel sleepy even typing that. I could give two shits less. It’ll be more pageantry since Shawn Michaels seems to be sticking to his guns and remaining retired. HHH is saving his big moment to take on Brock Lesnar. So there’s a solid chance he makes a reappearance at this how and interrupts this huge, gigantic, spectacular, who am I trying to kid again, this crappy, done 92 times too many reunion.
One last snippet from Dot Net from this morning, Ted DiBiase (Jr) is going to be back in the ring in about a month. I do love to end an article on some huge, gigantic, spectacular, oh, you get it at this point. -Kevin
According to his Twitter account, Ted Dibiase has a broken ankle.
DiBiase Posse last night I unfortunately broke my ankle. Can’t catch a break lately. Ha, Well I guess I did n a way! Its ok tho, James 1:2-3
In case you are wondering the last bit is from a Bible passage. According to biblegateway.com that says:
2 Consider it pure joy, my brothers and sisters,[a] whenever you face trials of many kinds, 3 because you know that the testing of your faith produces perseverance.
Of course that was the New International Version of the Bible. The King James version, and my personal favorite rendition says:
2My brethren, count it all joy when ye fall into divers temptations;
3Knowing this, that the trying of your faith worketh patience.
Then there is this translation of the exact same thing from the English Standard Version of The Bible.
Count it all joy, my brothers, when you meet trials of various kinds, for you know that the testing of your faith produces steadfastness.
So basically, Ted broke his ankle and this will try his patience but he has no choice cause God won’t heal his broken bone instantly. He has to sit around and watch everyone collect a WrestleMania check form the comfort to of a backstage monitor. Later on he will have to hear about the huge bonus his fellow independent contractors received, yes even the FCW talent who will likely play a druid, thanks to The Rock being on the card. Thanks God. -Jeremy
TNA had a problem with ripping off Afflicition and generally being lazy. The WWE isn’t much further behind. They aren’t lazy in cranking out shirts. The WWE also isn’t ripping off another company for their designs lazy. They are guilty of just being plain lazy when it comes to imagining shirts. Part of the problem has got to be the wrestlers themselves as Zack Ryder (Not a great shirt but certainly better than those about to get lambasted), CM Punk (I dig the hometown loyalty) and Santino Marella (Appropriate given his character) all have some interest in the “Authentic” category of WWE shirts. They have categories for Authentic, Basics, Limited Edition, Old School, Retro (I’m not sure what the difference is between those two categories) Superstar Logo, Top Rope and WWE Officially Licensed. I thought it was important to note the amount of categories because it helps my argument that they’re just a t shirt factory instead of going for quality shirts that are more likely to sell. I’m not surprised that two of the three shirts mentioned above are top sellers.
The first person on this list is my boy Dolph Ziggler. The WWE uses their brilliant naming of said Superstar to go straight for the Boogie Nights theme of neon lights. I’d be on board for that idea but they were super lazy with the design. It’s just the beginning of his song “I Am Perfection” in white, surrounded by blue with his initials “DZ” tacked onto the bottom. There isn’t a graphic in sight. On the back, it’s the same deal except it’s his name in white with the same blue surround. I know in the past I’ve harped on simplicity but this goes a bit too simple. There’s a borderline and this one falls on the lazy side of boring.
Dolph Ziggler’s newest offering isn’t any better. It says “It’s Not Show-ing Off” on five lines. The lettering is mainly white with a splashes of blue. The blue may be a picture but it’s hard to tell even with the magnifying glass. “If You Back It Up” is on the back of the shirt with the same white and blue patterns. It’s completely and utterly uninspired. I think it’s safe to say that Dolph didn’t major in marketing or have any friends who went to the Fashion School at Kent State.
Next on the list is the biggest offender (wokka wokka) is the Big Show. The first problem was that John Cena has been wearing dog tags for quite some time. Second, John Cena has switched from the jorts to the camo shorts before Big Show changed his attire. I don’t understand two of your biggest stars having the same look. With those problems in tow, the WWE decides to go with a shirt that has the initials “W.M.D.” on the front, dog bones for enlisted rank insignia on a sleeve and on the back it says “Big Show” with seven stars below it then “Precision Strike” on two lines. It’s just another shirt that screams “lazy”.
They started with Daniel Bryan/Big Show/Randy Orton recap. Orton starts out in Teddy Long‘s office. Teddy can’t let Orton wrestle because of his concussion. He tells him it’s tonight or the Elimination Chamber. Injuries happen so may as well use it. The Big Show & the Great Khali are taking on Cody Rhodes & Wade Barrett. Good way to get all of the Chamber participants on TV even if Bryan was only in the preview. Wade Barrett’s push against Orton is officially dead. Big Show destroys Barrett & Khali. Teddy Long says that Orton’s out of the Elimination Chamber. Mark Henry wants to be put in it. Big Show comes in and asks for Daniel Bryan tonight. Henry tells him to take his turn. Big Show drops him. Big Show destroys his office. They are really selling Show. He’s doing good work. Before I get to far, be sure to check out Dusty & Matt’s audio about TNA below. I doubt I’m getting to that review. I will watch it before Elimination Chamber, I hope.
Teddy Long wants security to politely take Big Show out of the building because of Big Show’s threats. Ted DiBiase takes on Hunico again. Ted has a soft cast now. Hunico gets a cheap win with Camacho’s help. Nice little undercard stuff. It’s got squat to do with the PPV though.
They did the usual replay of HHH/UT/Shawn Michaels. That has nothing to do with the PPV. Unless HHH makes it official there. The tag team match with the Usos versus Rosa Mendes with I suppose Primo & Epicomay get repeated on the Elimination Chamber if they think they don’t have enough filler for the show. Back Stabber for the win. Daniel Bryan comes to the ring smiling after it is announced Big Show has voluntarily left.
Daniel Bryan has the stick. We get replay of Monday again. Bryan brags about continuing to win. He tells the crowd he proved them wrong by winning the title. I just hope he doesn’t sink when he loses the title belt. Bryan has a strong run going here. Bryan should note that he’ll be champion at Wrestlemania like he claimed so many months ago. Bryan wants Lilian to announce him as the winner of the match. What a dick move. OK, there’s the missing Teddy. Sheamus is the happy volunteer replacement for Orton. Good way to get him involved in this mix since he’s been on standby for and through the Elimination Chamber. Cena versus Kane preview video package. Plus for a go home show.
Let’s keep rolling after a small break to watch Minnesota at Denver on the NBC Sports Network. Yep, I even watch college hockey.
Sheamus starts me off for the second part of the double header. History tells us one of the titles will change hands. Sheamus has always fought against the bullies whether it was in school or in the WWE. Wade Barrett comes out before we get a dumb Irish story. Barrett is going to win the Elimination Chamber. So, when does everyone else come down? Cody Rhodes is the next one out. Then the Big Show. I mean, what can you really say about spots like this? It does the trick but no one gets enough mic time to do much. Rhodes ripping on Show was pretty funny. Show & Sheamus toss the heels from the ring. I smell a tag team match.
For some reason, as Jinder Mahal gets worse, he gets more bullshit. We don’t care about the headdress or the plexiglass box it’s in. He takes on Khali for his spot in the EC. I hope Jeremy liked this squash match. We got replay of Mark Henry’s suspension. Aksana is hitting on Teddy when we go “live”. Daniel Bryan interrupts. Bryan goes vegan on Teddy for his barbeque party. Teddy uses JR’s sauce. Teddy does a great job. Not sure why he isn’t on Raw. He’s a babyface guy that for the most part calls it down the middle.
Beth Phoenix takes on Alicia Fox. Booker is calling Beth peerless. Did they suddenly forget about Tamina? She hits the ring to save Alicia. They have a nice little face off. The announcers are even selling a respect angle. Best Diva’s story since the original break of Kharma.
If you don’t think I FF thru the Rock review, you haven’t read this review before. Such a time saver to watch Smackdown afterwards. Natalya is getting nervous. What, they’re going with her farts really stink angle? Really, pretty much after a good Diva’s angle?
Another dumb entrance sequence. Big Show before the commercial break then Cody Rhodes, Wade Barrett & finish with Sheamus. I get it as far as popping the crowd before & after the break though. Still think it’s weird. Mitchell Cool makes a good point saying you need to believe in yourself. Booker was trying to say Cody couldn’t be dual champion. If he’s entrant #5 or #6, why wouldn’t he? Booker then says you need to believe how good you are between the ropes. Sheamus doing a roll up on Barrett was very uncharacteristic of his offense. Commercial break.
Ted Dibiase is hurt. No not the important one the other one; his kid, Ted Dibiase Jr. So that’s that. Check back later for more updates or something. But then Prowrestling.net has the skinny.
Really, what else am I supposed to say? He plans on being at The Royal Rumble so that is nice. I mean Kane needs someone to toss out of the ring.
It will keep him off Smackdown for an undetermined amount of time? You can still wrestle with ligament damage in your wrist I suppose. He doesn’t use the money gimmick so there will be no rubbing of the fingers to put strain on his hand at all so that is good. He no longer has arm candy in Maryse to grab on to his injured wrist as they walk to the ring. Laying on your back after jobbing doesn’t require any strain on your wrist as well. It is a good thing they had that scintillating flag match this past week or he wouldn’t have been able to wave it proudly after beating, um, what’s his name.
Why the hell wasn’t that a low rider bike on a pole match? First guy to grab the bike and wheel it around the ring without tipping over would be declared the winner. This way there could have been potential merchandise capabilities. At the very least Dibiase could have had that as a prop for his Dibiase Posse Parties. Imagine his fan (yup) getting drunk and riding around the parking lot before shows promoting the party.
The important issue here though is what really becomes of the Dibiase Posse Parties. Will his fan still gather at events? Will Ted still go out on the road and crash his fan themed parties? Will anyone really notice he isn’t there? What becomes of his Twitter account? Does he set himself up like Stephen Hawking so we can stay in tough? Will anyone notice that he has had three different gimmicks in the last six months? What? You hadn’t noticed. Not my fault. Pay attention next time. –Jeremy
Raw is going to be entirely too long. Why am I starting pretty much on time?
I couldn’t be less excited about three hours of sports entertainment. I’ve got nothing else to start this review so let’s roll.
Booker T & Hornswoggle get to lead off the Slammy Awards. I Didn’t Just See That even though it was on TV. What a brutal set of choices. I want to unsee all of those events. JR wins for his dance moves. Oh shit, a rap off. Please kill me. Congrats on getting people to turn off your product.
Ted DiBiase & Mick Foley present the next award for Holy Shit of the Year. Except they can’t say it. They think they’re funny with their jokes. I’m not sure that was Orton’s best RKO of the year. I would have went with Bourne’s Shooting Star Press into the RKO. Bourne gets a nod anyway. Big Show & Mark Henry win for a gimmick that’s been done before. Show comes out to accept. He keeps it short and we finally get a match. Why is Wade Barrett his opponent? Barerage will take out Show next if he wins the title from Henry.
Why not come up with a new name for the award? You’re PG, why even infer it? Barrett gets DQed for using a chair. Glad we got a whole minute of match time on TV. (That’s sarcasm.) And another commercial. Woof.
“Road Dogg” Jesse James gets to present a Slammy. #Useless fact, I dressed up like him for Halloween when I was at Kent. My roommate dressed up like Billy Gunn. I have no idea what is up for nomination. Rock mentioned Twitter in the montage, drink. CM Punk wins the Pipe Bomb Award since he started using the term in the WWE. He gives us a montage of Johnny Wooden GM. This whole first hour has been filler. Actually, that was kind of funny. I especially enjoyed the 80′s style music.
Lita gets a TV spot after her little weekend gaffe. I just keep wondering why her license was suspended. Is she such a bum she couldn’t pay for insurance? She is awarding a Diva-licious moment. Our winner is Kelly Kelly. She needed more press. (That’s sarcasm.) When does this get interrupted? Right away. Lita is supposed to be giving her a rub by raising her arm. It might be the second best thing they’ve done tonight by keeping that segment that short. Santino & The Bella Twins present the OMG Award. All of these awards feel the same. The only good part of HHH vs Undertaker is up for the award. Of course it wins. The only moment that deserved that award was CM Punk winning. HHH needed promo time since I keep forgetting this match is on TLC. Nice of Trips to have a new shirt. We get more replay. Why did I start doing this column? All because my dumb ass went to Wrestlemania in Atlanta. HHH is right so he’s going to do everything at TLC. Thanks for nothing.
Yup that’s right two shows in one week. Don’t get used to it since this is pretty much a special edition. Kevin asks Jeremy a bunch of questions about the Smackdown tapings at the Bi-Lo Center in glorious Greenville, SC. What stood out the most? Was it the disinterest from the production crew? Could it be the copious amount of children? Does Jeremy consider children a plague? They actually talk some of the wrestling but then it eventually devolves back in to on site observations. Does trash drive? If so what does it drive? If it rides in a garbage truck is it being chauffeured? All this and more so make sure and listen.