Nightmare At Orlando’s Buffets

Chef, are you sure this is enough food for Abyss and Mick Foley?

Chef, are you sure this is enough food for Abyss and Mick Foley?

According to this story on, Abyss revealed that his dream opponent is Mick Foley. I can’t wait for a fat, out of shape Mankind to take on a taller, fatter, worse version of Mankind that has no mic skills and even less talent in the ring. I’m drooling at the prospect of Mike Tenay and Don West calling a Million Thumb Tacks, Barb Wire, Doom and Despair, Boiler Room, Reverse Casket Match.

Abyss also claims that the WWE has contacted him at least three separate times. I know the WWE has an unhealthy obsession with big men that can’t work but they are either muscles heads (See Dave Batista) or guys so freakishly large that they become a celebrity in their home country like the Great Khali. Kind of tall and fat doesn’t fit in either of those categories. I think Abyss’ nose just grew by the length of a kendo stick. – Kevin

One Response to “Nightmare At Orlando’s Buffets”

  1. Awesome Dude 2009-07-18 at 9:32 am #

    TNA needs to do a Jonestown Massacre match and end the suffering. Abyss turned down the chance of making big money in WWE in so he can continue mutilating himself for no pops and little cash. What a retard. I hope Karen Angle’s pussy was really worth it.

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