Kevin’s Blog: Almost Live, Definitely Half Assed Review of #TNA #ImpactWrestling

repeater_300dpiI’m repeating my weekend travel plans from last week except I’m going for my girl’s grandmother’s 92nd birthday. So in order to clean off the DVR, let’s roll.

I forgot that they were going to be at IUP. James Storm is in the ring. AJ Styles is in the stands. Bad Influence joins them. I do like their sales pitch. Aces & Eights are beating up Storm again. The rest of the people who have been beat up suck. Joseph Park sucks the least. 3D thru the table so he can feel his Abyss roots.

Aces & Eights are still in the ring so that they can suck the energy out of the room. They beat up all of our heroes. Why didn’t they deliver that promo before the break? It was a short promo then you reset after the commercial break. Tazz tried to sound tough before another commercial break. Yep, thanks for making two segments suck instead of one.

Taryn Terrell is fighting Tara. The only thing catching my attention are Tazz & Tenay fighting like sixth graders. Then Tazz notes that ODB is sober. Yep, they let Taryn hang around to get the cheap pin when Tara got cocky. Always a decent way to build up a babyface without hurting the heel. People don’t care.

Rob Terry is taking on Jesse. I feel bad for this crowd. What did they do to deserve this? Robbie E saves Jesse from a pin. Weird spine buster type move for the win by Terry. Woof.

Bad Influence tries to recruit Bobby Roode. We get reruns of Jeff Hardy losing. Good for Chris Sabin coming back. He’s a tough cookie.

Austin Aries confronts Bobby Roode about getting Fortune back together. He makes several good points himself. I guess they’re gunning for the World Tag Team Titles. Chavo & Hernandez have the belts but seem like after thoughts in this match. The baby faces get to take advantage of an arguing team. Wow, Hernandez looked like he may have hurt himself. I’m not surprised. The match has been pretty good as a over all though. Kaz runs interference. Daniels interference back fires. Frog Splash win.

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Kevin’s Blog: Almost Live, Definitely Half Assed Review of #TNA #ImpactWrestling

LetsTrySomethingNew

Well, this isn’t something new but it is a new post. I have another one to finish up but it requires more thought than this type of article. I also need to get this off my DVR because I’m traveling to Altoona PA this weekend. Let’s roll.

We start with the 2 young male escorts Wes Brisco and Garrett Bischoff against Kurt Angle. They do a solid job of reminding us what the feud is about. AS usual nothing happens before a commercial break in a match. That was a hell of a bump for Bischoff to take on the double German suplex. Bischoff nails Angle with the chain for the win. This is stupid. Even my girl agrees. Nice of them to swipe The Shield’s move. Ken Anderson gets to babble. I can’t believe I liked him at some point.

Zema Ion and Petey Williams take on Kenny King for the X Division. I can’t stop staring at the referee’s hat to know what’s going on in the ring. I do like the X cam but I’m not sure why it looks so washed out. Oh, that’s the camera. I’m not paying much attention in general. They’re making Petey look pretty awesome. Ha. Cheap win by King. I feel bad for Ion. Brutus Magnus is going for the TV Title. Solid work from him as usual. I like his under statement.

Christy Hemme and Brooke Hogan are getting ready to launch the new Knockout’s website and photos. Brooke then talks down to Mickie James and Brook Tessmacher. Devon comes out first for some reason. Magnus gets attacked on the ramp by Mike Knox & DOC. This one trick pony is old. Aces & Eights aren’t really getting heat. Samoa Joe makes the save but why did they walk away? Kick his ass too.

Part of the reason to write this column is to rip on Tazz. He has surpassed Mike Tenay for worst announcer in wrestling. Having to act like a heel is not working for him in any way. He never sounds genuine. Samoa Joe is pissed. This AJ Styles thing isn’t interesting either. I don’t care which side he’s on. He’s not that big of a deal. I like him but whatever. Velvet Sky is selling an injury? Is this real? I don’t care enough to look up whether it’s real. ODB didn’t get any promo time for this match. Tessmacher then Mickie James. Forgot ODB was the ref. Why is Mickie looking like she wants to fight ODB? You can’t start rotating thru female refs this quickly. I like ODB ordering them back into the ring. Regular referees should be that stern. The Thesz Press off the top is always a like awkward. Tazz not having a come back to Tenay seals the deal on why he’s such a bitch now. You’re a tough guy compared to your partners. Bully them. Mickey reverses a reverse for the win. Solid match. Kaz and Christopher Daniels are moderately funny. Joseph Park gets attacked by Bully Ray. He gives us a sexist sentence. He’s a lawyer who isn’t going to press charges? Ironic. I wonder if they’re trying to do the same thing once every 15 minutes or 30.

Mickie James put together a good promo which is strange. It was never her strong suit. James Storm reminds us that this angle has taken entirely too long. Daniels & Kaz are back. Daniels said something. Kaz wants the tag team titles back. Austin Aries & Bobby Roode are still stuck in tag team hell because Aces & Eights are over bearing. Chavo & Hernandez clear the ring. Snooze.

So Jeff Hardy is really hurt? Roode has turned himself into a good talker. Matt Morgan is gloating again. Is he supposed to be turning baby face? He wants to take on Bully Ray but that cocky ass is so heelish. Why didn’t Aces & Eights just attack Samoa Joe too? Devon is a bad sergeant at arms. Tazz says people hate his guts because of his opinions. No, we hate you because you suck. Brisco distracts the ref. Anderson brass knuckles Samoa Joe. Devon makes the pin. It’s like clock work.

AJ Styles tries to run out of the match. James Storm attacks him on the ramp to stop him. Both men are wearing black. Aces & Eights wear black. Let’s try and make this product even more bland. AJ’s look is a little sheep dog for me. I do like a change for him though. It’d be kind of funny if he joined Kaz & Daniels. Storm taps to a sharp shooter type move. I know it has a name that I don’t remember. AJ Styles leaves Storm alone to catch a beating. Kaz & Daniels get an ass kicking too. Bully Ray delivers a fine enough promo but I don’t care because he became boring the minute he joined Aces & Eights. Dumb. It limits him way too much. He was better without this crew. They’re dragging him down. -Kevin

Jeremy’s Blog: TNA PPV Dilemma: $34.95, Please

So Monday morning Eric hits me up on messenger like one of those retirement ads worrying about retirement. He starts with a simple hi and then drops this line, “I know we have a spotty track record on these anymore but a whole TNA PPV came and went with no mention.” (Apparently Eric doesn’t realize that Kevin covers Impact Wrestling every Thursday night live on Twitter @stuntgranny but whatever. -K)

I respond back very matter of factly with “Yes all around the world no one mentioned it.” Now that may not be entirely true but why waste time with TNA after all? In their last two main events, the heel champion has wrestled to a draw and then retained his title by kicking the referee in the balls. Making matters worse, the five-minute extra period was placed on free television, so all of the people who paid – and by all I mean a slight few – for the PPV event got to see the resolution for free. Ha ha, suckers. $34.95, please.

Feel no remorse for those losers, though. If they ordered the PPV then they have to be fans of the product and they have decided TNA is the product for them and will gladly shell out $34.95. I was going to say $44.95 for the HD feed, but come on.

Here is the real issue and the hardest idea I am having the damndest time understanding. Why would anyone pay money to watch a TNA PPV? What is it that draws anyone to TNA in general let alone shelling out actual money to watch their stagnant product?

As Eric and I discussed the lack of TNA coverage – and I still say it is a universal lack of coverage – I started coming up with a list of different reasons that this league doesn’t matter. It isn’t exciting and is basically a great place to go after WWE to collect a big check while others just keep going thinking or hoping they can break out whether that is in TNA or get a barebones agreement with WWE.

The one argument in favor of TNA is that the roster has talent but it is being booked poorly or it is young or blah blah blah. Any and all excuses for TNA are now out the window. They have been around long enough to have their company in order but they still do not. We have already done a TNA Roster game Audio and the entire Stunt Granny crew covered a lot of this by way of running down the roster. I won’t bore you with a rehash of that but you can listen to it here. If you haven’t listened to it go ahead and then come on back. What do you have to lose? Time? You are wasting time reading this blog so your argument is invalid. If you don’t want to listen fine whatever. You have no reason if I provided the link.

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PWO – Season 5 – Episode 3

Episode Three has Three Title matches.

Joe Dombrowski opened the show by saying that three titles will be defended this hour with the main event being “The Megastar” Marion Fontaine taking on Jason Bane for the PWO Title. Jason Gory will defend the PWO TV Title against Gregory Iron and the Sons of Michigan (“Amazing” N8 Mattson & Benjamin Boone) against Ben Fruith & Corey Winters which starts off the show. Pedro De Lucca did formal introductions with everyone in the ring. The action was slow so Dombrowski & Maguire filled the air. Maguire kept harping on Fruith & Winters getting a title shot only because they were neighbors. Winters kept a headlock on Mattson for quite a while. Mattson got the upper hand then tagged in Boone. He kept the action slow with a reverse chin lock. Winters backed Boone into a corner with forearms. Winters drop kicked Boone into another corner. Fruith tagged in and tried to double team Boone. Fruith got planted by a Ron Simmons like spine buster. Boone and Mattson worked over Fruith while tagging in and out. Boone had Fruith in a Boston Crab but Winters broke it up before a tap. Fruith went for hat appeared to be a German Suplex. Mattson had a suplex blocked which turned into a Fruith Roll up. After the two count, Fruith hot tagged Winters. He gave Mattson a Cutter then rolled out of the way so that Boone splashed Mattson. Fruith missed a top rope drop kick. Boone speared Winters out of the ring. Mattson hit the M80 (Swinging Neck Breaker into a pin fall) for the victory.

Analysis: They did a good job of hiding what should have been a squash match by having the Sons of Michigan commit a couple of errors to keep Fruith & Winters in the match. Aside from Fruith butchering a German Suplex (at least that’s what I think he was going for) it was a well wrestled match. Score: +1.

Aeroform (Flip Kendrick & Louis Lynden) were standing by. They said that they were excited to get their hands on the Sons of Michigan. Lynden admitted they made a mistake at Wrestlelution but they will not make that mistake again. Lynden said that the Sons give the state of Michigan & the titles a bad name. Kendrick finished it by saying “They’re going to flip the world, son.” Analysis: He delivered that with more conviction than normal. I just wish he hadn’t looked back to his tag team partner. The starter & closer form of their promos continues to work well. Score: +1.

Joe Dombrowski did the low voice to talk about Hobo Joe’s injuries that will keep him out indefinitely. Jason Gory came out first. (The champs came out first in the first match too.) Gory came out without the belt because the Dead Wrestling Society is keeping it hostage. Gregory Iron came out to what sounds like new music. Gory grabbed Iron  by the neck and said he’d kill him. Iron punched him and knocked him to the outside. Iron tossed Gory into the guard rail and continued pounding on him. Gory head butted Iron in the stomach followed by a jaw jacker and a boot to the head. Gory assaulting Iron in a corner. Gory pulled back a finger on his right hand that is useless because of his cerebral palsy. Gory went back to it. Gory got in a Miz clothesline in the corner. Iron shoulder blocked Gory in the corner. Iron got caught charging into the corner. Gory splashed Iron while he was on the middle rope. Gory with a sling shot double stomp but it only got him a two count. A mid ring collision allowed Iron to recover. Iron got in a pair of clotheslines then a neck breaker. Dombrowski did say that the Dead Wrestling Society is banned from ring side. Iron dropped a knee and senton. Gory gave Iron a Code Breaker from the second rope. Gory tried to use a chain which distracted the referee. Gory blew mist in Iron’s eyes. Gory hit Trepidation (Spinning piledriver) for the victory.

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Kevin’s Blog: Almost Live, Definitely Half Assed Review of iMPACT Wrestling

There is not a chance in hell I was going to review this show on time.

I was going to post the PWO review today from week two but I didn’t even get a chance to do the final analysis while at work. Yeah, damn shame. So in lieu of that, I’m doing this review since I need to get material off my DVR because I’m heading back to Altoona this weekend to campaign for my dad. I’m not sure he wants to be connected to this dreck so no link. Let’s roll.

Kurt Angle calls out Bobby Roode. Angle compliments Roode then tells him how great he’s been in TNA. I honestly don’t remember much from Angle’s reign aside from him leading the Main Event Mafia. Even that, I can’t recall much. That makes me wonder how long I’ve been watching this program. When did it come on Spike? Roode repays the favor as far as blowing each other. I’m still having a hard time taking Roode seriously. He didn’t start the tourney on a roll and hasn’t been able to flesh out “Bobby”. For some reason TNA has a fight between RVD & Styles vs. Jerry Lynn & Christopher Daniels. I suppose this is a good day to do this since it’s final hype for Bound For Glory, which I won’t be ordering.

The brawl comes to the ring with Daniels & Lynn beat on Styles. For some reason, the bell got rung even though both guys were attacking him. RVD makes the save to finally settle into a real match. Lynn being worried about being in RVD’s shadow is hilarious. I like you Lynn, but you’re not in RVD’s league. I’m actually feeling bad for AJ. Aside from his extremely white trash tattoo, I love him as a wrestler. Styles Clash. I feel like I haven’t seen that in a while.

Samoa Joe is in trouble with another tall, thinner muscular guy. This time, it’s Matt Morgan, again. What the fuck? Seriously? Morgan wins with a roll up? Didn’t Crimson win last week with a similarly weak finish? Joe tries to play mind games but no one is buying it. How are you the alpha ass kicker since you’ve lost to them in consecutive weeks? The heel shouldn’t be in a weak spot going to the PPV. Of course Taz agrees with Joe.

Mexican Prison Style is how Mexican America wants to do it with Ink Inc. Oh please don’t go predictable Jesse. He doesn’t really. Oh, punk rock guy gets to deliver the message. Another brawl because you know, two wasn’t enough. Punk Rock chick makes the save against the women. She’s pretty hot even if she doesn’t have an ass. Neal doesn’t mention her name. How dumb. They have hyped only matches for the PPV. About the only upside right now.

Jesse Sorenson & Brian Kendrick take on Austin Aries & Kid Kash. Suicide dives by the faces start the match. Aries busted out the Chinese Door Bell. Always loved that move as a child. Taz saying Kash is getting better even in his older age. Wasn’t his problem most of the time that he kept telling off promoters? Maybe his attitude got better. Kendrick gets the win so that he can lose at BFG. Aries has lost some of his mojo since coming in. The push of the X Division has slowed.

Karen Jarrett gets to give the pep talk to the rest of the wrestlers. She got them on the card. I’m nodding off. I should grab a beer. Good choice. Velvet is still getting the biggest disrespect card. Traci Brooks gets Karen to trip over her. The ladies brawl after wards. That’s brawl number 4 just in case we lost count. Bubba warned Anderson about getting out of line. I’ll be shocked when that match devolves into a brawl. (That’s sarcasm.)

AJ blames Daniels for the current woes of their families not playing together. Daniels attacks him from behind. Nice of brawl #1 to have half a come back. Scott Steiner takes on Ken Anderson with guest enforcer Bully Ray. Whoops, gave him the wrong name earlier. Anderson takes control but is so fat he keeps his shirt on. Abyss is ready to blast Anderson but clocks Steiner. Anderson should not need a cheap win over Steiner. He should look like a threat to Bully Ray, not Abyss. Granted, if he doesn’t attack him here, you know he’s costing Bully Ray at BFG.  Brawl #5 1/2. Anderson makes a temporary save. OK, make Bully Ray look strong is a good idea.

James Storm calls out Angle’s dumb theory. Kurt tries to drop the doubt in there again and Storm sort of buys it. Another Jarrett gets to suck on camera. I FF thru the preview for BFG & the rewind of the championship Roode video. The commercials.

Roode takes on Jarrett & Gunner. So is this a real handicapped match? Jarrett takes a coffee break. OK, it seems like a real one after that break. Roode looked funny with his clothes lines then barely lifted Gunner on a back body drop. Jarrett then Gunner got locked in the cross face. Jarrett attacks Roode. I can’t believe how weak a win over two opponents was just presented. Brawl #6.5 happens with Immortal & James Storm. Jeff Hardy makes the save which makes no sense. If Storm couldn’t help as a singular man, why would Hardy? Roode caves in and shakes Hardy’ hand. Storm is an alcoholic, why should he hate Hardy? OK, all is good. Bad timing for Hardy still though. It takes the spot light off of Roode with his big return.

I FF thru the introdcutions. Why are Hulk Hogan & Sting on the same side of the table? Are they dating? Going to make out? After signing, Hogan barely flips the table. Hogan tries to play the pity card by saying he was trying to help the company. You didn’t help them out at all. The ratings and recognition aren’t better. You barely mention them on your media tours you publicity hound. Man on man action is promised by Hogan. He even said it in bed room voice. Bischoff inserts his mug to distract Sting. They caught me on that. I thought that’d center on Bischoff. Could to keep the spot light on Sting & Hogan. -Kevin

Mr. Anderson wants to be done wrestling in five years, can we make it sooner?

Comes complete with torn triceps and dislocated shoulder!

According to Prowrestling.net, TNA’s Ken Anderson, aka Mr. Anderson, told the Dover Post that he’d like to be finished with his in-ring pro wrestling career in five years. The biological alarm clock he calls “a chain of push-derailing injuries while in WWE” suggests sooner, but hey, with Anderson talking about quitting, we’ll take what we can get.

“If I’m still doing this five years from now, please, just shoot me,” Anderson said.

It’s already on my calendar, friend.*

“I love the wrestling business, I love entertaining people, but it doesn’t define me.”

Oh, well, let us know when you plan to start entertaining people again. I mean, you can only ride a dead horse so far, and the only reason you’re overusing the word “asshole” is because that term is somehow more socially acceptable than “douchebag,” another word a) you’d happily drive into the ground like a beat-up Chevy Cavalier and b) the audience would find entertaining only because they’d get to say it loudly and proudly on national TV. Those hillbillies don’t love you, they just love to curse and spit. And yes, they probably kiss their mamas with those mouths. Real deep and tongue-like. Yep, that’s who you’re “entertaining” these days. Anyway, T minus four years and 364 days! -Eric

*=figuratively

Stunt Granny Big 11 Week Ending 3/26/11

1. Abdullah the Butcher - I told a co-worker for the first time since I started here that I’m a pro wrestling fan. Of course he wanted to make sure I knew it was fake, but then he knowingly talked about wrestlers using pieces of razor blades to cut themselves during matches. I told him about Abdullah the Butcher and the scar tissue into which he can insert a quarter. I thought my co-worker was gonna puke. - Eric

2. The Miz - Let’s see how many times he ends up on the list this week. The Miz’s appearance on “Conan” was the stuff televisions were made for. Not too many people could verbally get the better of Conan O’Brien, but Miz unabashedly talked over the host, then gave him the nickname “Ginga Ninja” and the catchphrase, “Step into my dojo, mofo!” I really hope it sticks. - Eric

3. Bret Hart – The Hitman relieved himself of the old “HitmanBretShart” Twitter handle but kept up the juvenile, one-sided war of words with Hulk Hogan, particularly via Twitpic (or YFrog, or whatever, who cares), portraying Hogan as a withered-up old hanger-on, to the enjoyment of a few thousand smelly Internet nerds. Meanwhile, Hogan made a cameo on “American Idol,” still one of TV’s biggest rated shows. In other words, fuck you, Bret Hart. – Eric

4. TNA Impact - I swear I am trying to watch this show but damn they make it difficult. This is the exact train of events of trying to watch this week: I went to the DVR menu. I chose Impact. I fast forwarded thru the end of Gangland. I stopped when I saw Ken Anderson. I started getting annoyed at the opening. I fast forwarded until I saw a marker board in the ring. I got more annoyed. I shut it off after four minutes of viewing. I then got a text from Dusty. It wasn’t positive. How the hell were we watching at the same time when we are in different time zones anyway? - Jeremy

5. Michael Cole - Cole is the greatest heel in wrestling. He would make a great character in WWE comics. I mean he already has his own hideout in the Cole Mine as well as a loyal henchman. - Jeremy

6. Eddie Edwards - He won the Ring Of Honor title. He defeated Roderick Strong. Past champions in ROH include CM Punk, Samoa Joe and Homicide. We once met Homicide in Orlando, which is the home of Walt Disney World and Universal Studios.  We were trying to drunkenly speak with Cheerleader Melissa. She was a very nice person but her friend was annoyed. I bet if she knew who we were it would  have had a much more positive effect on her. By the way,  I used these names so I can tag them without a hint of guilt for hits for the site. - Jeremy

7. Kurt Angle – As Eric posted earlier today, Angle was arrested today in North Dakota when he couldn’t keep his car on the road. Police smelled alcohol on him and he was done for. Does TNA have the least professional locker room in wrestling history? There just seems to be no discipline or personal responsibility whatsoever there. – Dusty

8. Kurt Angle’s mugshot – It’s as if he’s simply taking a fan photo on a sunny afternoon.

9. Ian Rotten – Recently ethered into oblivion on some blog talk radio show by a 40 year old weirdo. I experienced this audio in the following way: The two idiots are yelling at each other. I am drowsy. I fall asleep. I wake up. The two idiots are still yelling at each other, now in harsher tone. Ian is basically every lowest common denominator wrestling fan ever, separated only by the fact that he actually got to run his own shows. So kudos for that. – Dusty

10. WWE’s partnership with Kmart – I guess WWE figures before all the Kmarts in the world are driven out of business by the existence of Walmart and the fact that they are crummy, dirty stores, they better form a partnership with them to promote their house shows. Soon enough, though, Ian Rotten will be hosting IWA MS shows on the parking lots of each and every one of these fine retail stores. – Dusty

11. TNA’s Spring Cleaning Sale – Don West is the fucking fucking man.

Dusty

In which Auto Tune dies a hideous death

… and Dusty’s brains ooze out the side of his head.

Yeah, pretty much the worst thing ever. - Dusty 

Stunt Granny Big 11 #2 – We like to number things.

1. Ken Anderson - Dipshit goes out of his way to prove that WWE and especially Triple H, has him nailed. He has become nothing and has done nothing since being let go by WWE yet he bitches about his former employer. Maybe, just maybe if he had listened to the criticism instead of blowing them off he’d be a big deal in front of tens of thousands per week instead of two hundred.  This also applies to Matt Hardy, Jeff Hardy and whoever else signs with TNA after WWE dumps them.

2. Gail Kim vs. Alicia Fox – These women put on a very good (not great) match on Superstars. I’m not going to claim they’re pushing the women again but it was nice to see.

3. Shawn Michaels – The newest WWE Hall of Famer proved his charisma and connection with the crowd on Monday Night Raw by showing up, saying nothing, landing one superkick and still soaking in a huge reaction from the crowd. It would take 20 DH Smiths and 30 Ted DiBiases to equal one Heartbreak Kid.

4. Monday Night Raw – The latest edition of WWE’s flagship product was their most awkward and ill-conceived in quite some time. CM Punk standing on the TitanTron; Flying in Shawn Michaels for no reason but John Cena phoning in another shitty promo; R-Truth losing yet again to Alberto Delrio but buy count out so he got protected?; CM Punk awkwardly taking reins of Nexus; this show was hard to watch.

5. Ernest Shell  – It’s hard to give the already schysty independent wrestling promoter a bad name, but this guy managed to do it by stiffing his wrestlers *and* be carted out of the building by police. When I put on my one and only poorly attended wrestling show, I at least paid the guys and gave them some food; I didn’t have women wrestlers threatening to kick my ass, too.

6. Hoarders – TNA didn’t have enough Hardy when they hired Jeff Hardy, who allegedly hoards drugs, so they also hired his brother Matt Hardy, who allegedly hoards Twinkies. TNA is definitely hoarding ex-WWE superstars. Immortal was trying to hoard title belts but TNA did something right this week (Trademark to Jeremy) and got it off Jeff Hardy to Ken Anderson, who allegedly hoards injuries.

7. Gabriel & Slater to Smackdown - SD needed some more talent so adding Barrett and this duo will do them a lot of good. It should also allow people like Dolph Ziggler the chance to move up to the main event level while keeping the mid-card intact.

8. Kevin Nash – Like five minutes after announcing his retirement, it was announced that Nash will be returning to TNA at a 20 percent pay cut. Nash continues to be one of the smartest people in wrestling, and I’m sure once TNA goes out of business, McMahon will take him back again as well.

9. Samoa Joe – According to Meltzer, Joe accidentally stabbed himself at his home by sitting on a pocket knife, but was able to use superglue to get the wound closed. So now Joe is exactly Sabu, minus all the stuff that made Sabu awesome.

10. New Best Match Ever – It’s this:

and

11. Only Solitaire – It’s not wrestling related, but who gives a shit. It’s the best resource for music reviews that exists on the internet. Go HERE for all the fun. But then be sure to come back here, because here is more important than there, or everywhere.

Willy The Worker Strikes Back

Who can it be now?

This was recently on the Observer front page, under the title “A former major wrestling star looks at where TNA stands today”:

By name withheld

I was thinking about this when I heard that Hulk Hogan & Eric Bischoff were not at the TNA PPV & the last TV taping. They are already setting up their exit strategy with 3 months left in their contracts. It’s no secret to even an idiot like Dixie that they conned her for a bunch of money & some initial press releases that made TNA seem bigger then they seemed. After 9 months they brought nothing to the table.

1. The Monday night war cost a ton of money with reduced TV viewership. The end result was that TNA spent the last 3-4 months rebuilding their lost audience from the move from Thursday to Monday to Thursday. TNA garnered roughly the same 1.2 rating prior to the Hogan faction a year ago.

1. PPV revenue to my knowledge had gone down with the Hogan faction. They hot shotted all of their main matches & angles on free TV to an audience that had no interest in paying to see anything on PPV. The initial PPV’s were chalked up as building blocks to a PPV that would be a bigger pay off. Thus far their PPV business had been worst off then a year ago.

1. House show business had been up in some markets & down in others. This is more indicative to advertising. In 8 years, TNA had never even built up any core cities that they can regularly return several times in a year with a steady fan base.

1. Booking is no better or worst, since Vince Russo is being retained for god knows what reasons. Either Hogan & Eric are keeping him in order to blame him for all of the booking problems. Either Dixie is just so clueless that she is not open to any changes in creative.

1. Eric Bischoff had probably spent the last 10 months pitching SPIKE one TV concept after another. SPIKE might already be tired of listening to his used car salesmen pitches about an additional midget wrestling show & additional TNA programming. Once Eric no longer got anybody from SPIKE to listen to his new TV ideas, his usage for TNA is no longer needed.

I see Hulk Hogan hot shotting some big angle in September in hopes that it could lead to a contract renewal. If that doesn’t occur, excuses ranging from back surgery, family issues, new TV reality show, etc will be his exit strategy. Eric probably had already packed his bag off of this sinking ship with nothing to gain by being aligned by TNA if he got nothing to sell to SPIKE.

Just Eric’s comment that there is no similarity between the MMA & wrestling fan base is either a combination of being oblivious & not having a pulse on the industry. The older wrestling fans have graduated from wrestling to MMA for the elements that wrestling is currently lacking in it’s over scripted & over booked environment. Wrestling is no longer creating the chase for the title in which wins & losses mean anything. The champion is overexposed by working on TV every week & being made to look like they don’t deserve the title.

The MMA promos seem more genuine & realistic in creating empathy or hatred based on the personalities. I don’t follow MMA, but a normal UFC countdown special is more likely to sell more buys to me by presenting the wrestlers as athletes VS. A immobile 57 year old man cleaning house on the main heel character.

Eric is a one trick pony that is still living off of his limited successes from WCW in 1996-1999. I still can’t believe a simpleton like Dixie after 8 years had never bothered to read a sheet to inquire about Eric & Hulk’s track records in creating stars.

All of TNA’s big money acquisitions look bush league with the booking that is behind them. With all of Jeff Hardy’s baggage, he is no where over as he was a year ago on WWE TV. They took a legitimate WWE headliner that is fairly young and made him just another performer. Accept he got a high price tag with no real booking to emphasize his strengths & to hide his weaknesses [awful promos].

Rob Van Dam went from a guy with a cult like following to nothing but TV fodder for Hulk Hogan to save. I got no problems with TNA making money acquisitions for Jeff Hardy & RVD in order to attract some of the WWE audience. I just question their lack of long term planning to keep them special & how they should be PPV draws by headlining matches that weren’t possible a year ago against the TNA roster as if they were dream matches. RVD VS. Samoa Joe for example was a PPV quality match up that had already been given away for free.

In 8 years, the company had barely created one bonafide star on their own. A.J. Styles should have been their RVD long before they got the real one. A.J. had been turned so many times that nobody even cares about him.

Desmond Wolfe had the chance to get over. They rushed thru his program with Kurt Angle that could had been more beneficial if they stretched it out with an in ring rivalry as the main premise to the story line.

Don’t even get me started on Samoa Joe. Just a chase for the title & a MMA build up with Kurt Angle was enough to build up to one of TNA’s best PPV buy rates. If TNA didn’t learn from that scenario, then they are just beyond clueless. Too many jobs, repackaging, & stupid story lines made Samoa Joe from a killer/main eventer to just another guy on the roster.

I can’t believe Dixie now thinks the new recipe in turning the corner is by hiring Paul Heyman. In 8 years, Dixie hired almost every WWE main eventer that was no longer working for them. Instead of taking TNA to the next level with their already solid roster, the company continued their path to no where. Simple reason the company went from stagnant & in to the toilet, the booking sucks. Vince Russo had probably done more damage to the point Paul Heyman might not even be able to turn it around.

I don’t blame Heyman for making big demands. Nobody wants to risk their reputation & time in to a project that doesn’t have big rewards at the end of the tunnel. Nobody wants to waste their time in being blocked by the pecking order of trying to find out who got more stroke then the other. Plus the current booking will take a month or two in order to wrap them up before you have a clean sleight in order to restart the company.

I don’t blame Paul Heyman in wanting to revamp the entire brand marketing of TNA to the general public. After 8 years, TNA should have some sort of buzz to the general public, rather then be considered a bad WWE rip off. I got nothing bad to say about their roster, since it is on par & possibly better then WWE in many aspects. After 8 years, they had not created any larger then life superstars on their own.

TNA thus far had not created any merchandise that is being sold in any retail stores that is a top seller. Children don’t care enough about their wrestlers or even follow the product enough to have purchased their figure line that was sold 4 years ago. The video game was not a top seller. With the dwindling DVD market, most of their retail DVD’s are constantly being marked down. Obviously TNA had not reached out to whatever base line of fans that they have in order for them to further support their product by making additional purchases outside of PPV or house show tickets. I always gauge a successful wrestling character or company based on the amount of T shirts I spot in public or at a wrestling show.

I seen countless children with Rey Mysterio, John Cena, & Dave Batista shirts when I’m at the mall or anything wrestling related. When was the last time any of us seen any TNA shirts worn outside of a TNA event? Obviously TNA already missed their mark on the children demographic. I guess by having Ken Anderson encourage the audience to scream asshole will bring that missing children demographic, bring in major advertisers & licensing deals, & not have TV executives frown upon the wrestling & fan audience.

TNA should be appealing to the 25 & above male demographic that no longer finds WWE appealing to their tastes. Instead TNA had already handed that audience over to MMA by not learning from what works in MMA & incorporating it in to their product with sensible booking.

Hopefully my ranting & raving made sense. It was just various aspects of TNA that had really been annoying me for some time.

I love how everything is under number one. I guess that means it’s all equally important. As to who it was who wrote this, let the speculation begin! – Dusty

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