TNA has a new television program and network

Posted on January 21, 2013 by stuntgranny
Poop. Poop is an idea.

Poop. Poop is an idea.

TNA announced today they have reached a two year contract extension with FUEL TV to air what assuredly is compelling television. FUEL who carries Impact Wrestling will now be adding TNAs new programs , well here is how they describe it.

‘Unfinished Business’ – an in-depth look at historic feuds and moments in IMPACT WRESTLING history – and ‘British Boot Camp’, a thrilling six-part entertainment series following four aspiring British wrestlers as they embark on their ambition to join TNA’s wrestling roster.

Now you may be wondering if I have gotten the channel name wrong. No it is not Spike TV carrying IMPACT wrestling,  it is definitely FUEL TV. It just so happens that we are talking about Australian television and not the good ole US of A. Yup, TNA is trumpeting a television deal with a network in a totally different country since the company makes no waves over here.

Just how long is this Unfinished Business show supposed to run? What historic feuds have they had? They certainly have had feuds but nothing really historic. So, it should have a shelf life of about four to six weeks I figure.

Leave it to the exhausted braintrust of TNA to concentrate on another program when their flagship program still draws the exact same god damn rating it has for years. There has been no growth other than the amount of television they have and even then they are ridding themselves of PPVs. So there is less money making potential with less PPVS but now we get a nostalgia show of a company that has been around ten years.

I give up.  -Jeremy

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Stunt Granny Audio #211

Posted on December 11, 2012 by stuntgranny

IdiotsEverywhere

Jeremy and Kevin are back and they’re talking about idiots, idiots everywhere. The biggest idiot may be in Kevin’s office. Kevin lays out his evidence and would like to know if you know anyone that competes in his utter lack of knowledge. They move on to talk about the idiots in the WWE. Why do they feel the need to have the heels lose all of the time? Does Eve Torres winning count as a heel victory? How about Vickie Guerrero? Jeremy took issue with Kevin not liking Brad Maddox. What excuse for poor writing did Kevin come up with? Somehow, the guys migrate to talking about the idiots that run TNA. What similarities do their idiots have with the WWE idiots? What would help Aces & Eights? Who didn’t know DOC stood for Director of Chaos? How does that dovetail with his wrestling viewing habits? Jeremy & Kevin do talk about the idiots running ROH. Not for long as they ping pong between TNA & the WWE. Could both companies learn from critically acclaimed television these days? Could they learn from children’s television? What lessons do they think the wrestling companies can learn? Join them in this audio journey.

Stunt Granny Audio Show #211

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Stunt Granny Audio #210

Posted on December 5, 2012 by stuntgranny
Just think, it could have been Kevin instead of the useless eight foot guy in the back.

Just think, it could have been Kevin instead of the useless eight foot guy in the back.

Kevin and Dusty are at the helm for this schizophrenic edition of Stunt Granny Audio! Throughout, Dusty feels like his teeth are going to explode out of his face, and that he is going to throw up all over himself, but you have to expect that kind of quality playing-through-the-pain type of situation from our intrepid heroes. Kevin regales us all with how he sent in an audition tape for Survivor Australian Outback. Did he actually speak in a terrible Crocodile Hunter accent through the entire video? Did he actually fight a baby kangaroo? Did he actually get a call back from the producers of the show? You’ll have to listen to find out. Dusty regales us with his geekazoid inner knowledge of all things Survivor, as he informs Kevin of just how hard that season was for everybody, what with the starving and the IV’ing medical fluids and the falling into fires and such. Also, they talk about how WWE has no vision and is wasting people who could be useful to them, and have their heads straight up their asses when it comes to the AJ Lee storyline. Or really, when it comes to any storyline or PPV “effort” over the last year. The duo debate whether TNA putting the championship belt strap on Austin Aries was an example of them showing true vision, and they talk about a bunch of other stuff to and you’ll need to listen to find out what it is, yo.

Stunt Granny Audio Show #210

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TNA to hold 2013 Lockdown at Alamodome (using word “dome” loosely)

Posted on November 30, 2012 by stuntgranny
7:59 p.m. Sunday, March 10, 2013

7:59 p.m. Sunday, March 10, 2013

If you tuned into TNA Impact Wrestling last night, you heard a shocking announcement. No, not that square-jawed Brooke Hogan is involved in a relationship with a man. According to Gerweck.net, TNA has booked the Alamodome in San Antonio, Texas, for its Lockdown pay-per-view in March 2013.

Nothing about “TNA” and “dome” make sense together in a sentence, except maybe a year ago when I would have said “TNA Knockout Angelina Love needs to give me dome.” What we have here is a company who draws an 80%-full house in Ottumwa, Iowa (and 2 of those people only want to steal your world title belt to pawn it for meth money) now hoping to fill at least the 20K-capacity basketball configuration where the San Antonio Spurs play, or at most the 66,000-seat Dome that even WWE couldn’t sell out in 1997 with hometown hero Shawn Michaels as the headliner, hot-as-fire Steve Austin winning the Royal Rumble, and a bunch of old Mexicans like Canek and Mil Mascaras in supporting roles. If I were The Chism Company in San Antonio, I’d stay open on March 10, because TNA will need to tarp the shit out of that building. -Eric

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TNA is finally profitable on pay-per-views

Posted on October 30, 2012 by stuntgranny

It took a little help, but they got finally got there! Quote:

Earlier this year the U.S. authorities arrested Yonjo Quiroa of Comstock Park on suspicion of operating several websites that linked to unauthorized sports streams. Following his arrest, Quiroa was detained for more than nine months, and he has now been sentenced to time already served plus deportation to his home country. In addition the site admin has to pay restitution to five major sports leagues, totaling $13,000.

Under the flag of Operation Fake Sweep, the Department of Justice and Homeland Security’s ICE unit seized several domains belonging to major sports streaming sites in February.

In addition to pulling these sites offline the feds also arrested 28-year-old Yonjo Quiroa of Comstock Park, Michigan. Quiroa was apprehended for allegedly operating nine of the seized domains and was jailed pending trial.

The sites in question, including hq-streams.tv, sportswwe.com and sports95.com, did not host any infringing files but listed hyperlinks to streams offered by popular third-party services such as Justin.tv.

In the criminal complaint an ICE officer states that through these links he was able to access unauthorized streams of NBA, NHL and WWE events. The complaint further noted that during 2010 and 2011 Quiroa grossed $13,000 by running advertisements on his sites.

In the months following his arrest Quiroa was held in custody without bail. In August he avoided trial by entering a guilty plea for a copyright misdemeanor on the understanding that he would receive a sentence of between 6 and 12 months.

After nine months in custody Quiroa was sentenced late last week.

District Court Judge Robert Ellis sentenced the former site admin to time served for one count of criminal copyright infringement. In addition, it was ordered that Quiroa should be deported to his home country after paying $25 in criminal penalties.

The largest monetary penalty, however, comes from the restitution he has to pay to several sports leagues. The $13,000 Quiroa earned in revenue was counted as losses to the sports majors so the NBA, NFL, NHL, WWE and TNA will each get $2,600.

Losses and restitution

The verdict is the first against the operator of a sports streaming link site in the United States and sets the bar for similar cases in the future.

This includes the pending case of Brian McCarthy, the owner of Texas-based sports streaming site Channelsurfing.net, who was arrested Match 2011.

The sentencing for a lesser misdemeanor crime also raises questions about the looming extradition of UK student Richard O’Dwyer. The U.S. wants to extradite O’Dwyer for his involvement in TVShack, a site linking to TV steams.

The Department of Justice has yet to comment on the outcome of the current case. Interestingly no press release was sent out, unlike in February when the arrest of Quiroa was widely distributed over the news wire. – Dusty

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Hulk Hogan wins the first battle. Weilds a large pimp hand.

Posted on October 29, 2012 by stuntgranny

Yet another national crisis has nearly come to end dear readers. No I am not talking about Frankenstorm Sandy , I am referring to the litigation involved in the Hulk Hogan Sex tape. Hulk Hogan has reportedly come to a settlement with Bubba The Love Sponge according to TMZ. Terms were not disclosed but that doesn’t matter. What does matter is that Hogan is still suing Gawker and Heather Clem. As a reminder the lawsuit is for $100 million. If Hogan wins this suit this could be the most expensive and haunting penis this woman has ever received.

But really how awesome is Hulk Hogan? Not only does his old wrinkled ass get to bang out a young hot broad but now he is suing her directly for a cash settlement?  Hulk Hogan’s pimp hand has to be as large as his schlong. This old bastard has no right soiling this young woman’s vag but he does and he does himself proud. Now he is turning around expecting her to pay up because they taped the deed and it somehow leaked out for the entire world to see. We should all be so lucky.

I do not understand the big deal. When I am Hogan’s age and some sweet young cooz wants to suckle on the dong of fame then by all means go ahead. Just give me a copy so I can show the rest of the gang here at Stunt Granny. Hell, I would rent out an Imax theater and stretch that shit out to make it fit. (See what I did there?) -Jeremy

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Samoa Joe poses an interesting question on Twitter

Posted on October 26, 2012 by stuntgranny

Samoa Joe wants to know:

I know my many, many answers: Authority figures with real authority… equal weight on the importance of both talking and wrestling, but not equal time, thus the complete abolishment of the 20-minute soliloquy… along those lines, the return of the in-ring/podium/backstage interview that always includes an emcee/announcer/talk-show host… a 7-year statute on “takeover” angles…

What about you? Leave a comment below!

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Honey Boo Boo Gonna Wrestle Child

Posted on October 23, 2012 by stuntgranny

You know, this is just white trash all over and it really is just an exasperating idea. According to TMZ James Pittaro of Pro Wrestling Academy in New Jersey has sent out the offer to Honey Boo Boo herself to train with TNA star Robbie E. Yes that adorable scamp Honey Boo Boo of “Here Comes Honey Boo Boo” and “Toddlers and Tiaras “ fame has been propositioned to train for professional wrestling.  It should be noted here that this kid is seven.

Yup, seven-years-old.

Seeing as how I watch both Toddlers and Tiaras and Here Comes Honey Boo Boo this makes me the utmost authority on the situation. SO, this tiny piece of trash has no business anywhere near the profession of professional wrestling. This girl has been exploited most of her life and wrestling is not something she needs.  If you watch the show there is no regard for this child’s well being and it is clear that this promoter wants nothing but the cash grab from having this monster on his shows.

Yes this is a clear attempt at attention on the part of James Pittaro and it worked. Doesn’t make it right of course but it was successful. It made TMZ, wrestling sites and this site, whatever it is. This is never going to come to pass of course but if it got him attention so be it.

The worst part about this story has to be that TNA has found its name dragged in to this through Robbie E. Okay that is a lie, Dixie Carter has to be in hog heaven right now seeing the TNA name on TMZ and the cable news outlets. Between this and the Hulk Hogan boinkathon TNA sure is getting a lot of publicity. Well, they might have if Hogan had mentioned Bound for Glory and TNA at least 2% of the time he was making media rounds last week.  But that is for another post.

Disclaimer: I don’t really care about Honey Boo Boo and her monster of a mother. There is no reason to have sympathy for anyone involved in that show. -Jeremy

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TNA’s Tara (aka Victoria) to open pizza restaurant in Chicago; weeks later, CM Punk will sleep with her

Posted on October 18, 2012 by stuntgranny

Tara, taking orders for a piping hot DDP (Deep Dish Pizza).

According to Prowrestling.net, Lisa Marie Varon, better known as Tara from TNA (and sometimes remembered as WWE’s Victoria) plans to open a pizza restaurant in Chicago and make it her full-time job, while still wrestling for TNA, even at age… 41? Seriously? Read this:

Varon was also asked how much longer she intends to wrestle. “I get the ‘how much longer’ question in every interview nowadays,” she said. “I get it. I’m 41 in an industry where girls breaking in are half my age.

“My perspective is, I feel great, I think I look great, I put on outstanding matches for the fans, I bring out the best in my opponents, and most importantly, I am having a blast.” Read the full story at Chicagotribune.com/entertainment/celebrity/aboutlastnight/chi-lisa-marie-varon-pizza-lincoln-park-20121018,0,7414760.column.

“I think I look great.” Well, I *know* you look great, so rather than worry about that, why don’t you sling me a warm slice. And then let me buy a pizza. (And thanks to Kevin for the reminder: Here’s hoping this business of hers doesn’t mysteriously burn down like the body shop. I’m looking at you, Jeff Hardy.) -Eric

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Stunt Granny Audio #204

Posted on October 16, 2012 by stuntgranny

With a Presidential debate and a Major League Baseball playoff game going on around them, our intrepid heroes Kevin and Dusty are focused on one thing, and one thing only: the major happenings of the last week in the world of professional wrestling! The two contemplate who would have been a better choice to lead the Aces and Eights group in TNA. Would anyone in the known universe have been a better choice than poor, mediocre Devon? They talk about the ponderous Hulk Hogan sex tape, and how HH is no longer b-fri’s with notorious wife swapper Bubba the Love Sponge. Is Jeff Hardy the right choice to lead TNA as its World Heavyweight Champion, or is he a ticking time bomb that you should never put in such a prominent position? Dusty makes his sales pitch for Ryback winning the WWE title, and Kevin is *almost* buying. And the fearless duo finishes things off with a Mount Rushmore of Wrestling Tough Guys, as the backdrop to the alleged altercation between Harley Race and Vader this past week. And a whole lot more nuggets of golden awesomeness, so listen!

Stunt Granny Audio Show #204

Filed under: Audio Updates, Podcasts, TNA News, WWE News | Tagged: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 1 Comment »

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