Velvet Sky, totally natural breasts, officially gone from TNA

Posted on July 27, 2012 by stuntgranny

Any excuse to post these. I mean, this.

And so it is official; after days of speculation Velvet Sky has confirmed she is no longer part of TNA. Via her Twitter account she released the following:

“I have been granted my release by TNA at this time,” Sky wrote. “It’s what’s best for me right now and I wanted to thank TNA and all the fans for their constant support in me. Stay tuned though…

“And I also want to thank Vince Russo for creating and believing in the team of The Beautiful People. We had a great run!”

So now the talk is whether or not she ends up in WWE. Dusty and I discussed this a bit yesterday and it just doesn’t seem to make a lot of sense. But then WWE doesn’t really care about in ring product for the women seeing as how the matches go all of five minutes.

Velvet is a gorgeous woman with giant natural breasts so she would seem like a shoo-in for WWE. Excuse me, giant breasts, my bad, and that isn’t a complaint.  Anyway, the role of the manipulative, bitchy chick has been filled by Eve and she isn’t exactly replaceable (wink).  So what use is Velvet to WWE? She can’t rub her crotch on the middle rope more than once before getting fired.  Does WWE really need yet another woman on the roster to not fill time on television?

Oh, and let the Beautiful People reunion go already. If this was WWE of five years ago then maybe but there is definitely no place for them now. Even with the Bella Twins running out of town. -Jeremy

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Maxine someoneorother has left NXT

Posted on July 2, 2012 by stuntgranny

What the hell is going on with women in wrestling? Angelina Love is out of TNA and mere days before that Maxine announced that she is leaving NXT. I would say WWE but let’s be honest here. She had , um, one match on actual WWE programming?

Yup, according to Prowrestling.net she finally was granted her release and made a point of saying she isn’t going to another company. In case you were wondering of course.

This is the place where I am supposed to do research and give some background on her but who the fuck cares? No really. Another cookie cutter woman is leaving WWE, ok I relented and gave her WWE, so what’s the big deal. There is nowhere for her to go other than TNA, Wash rinse repeat.

So good luck, whatever.  -Jeremy

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Angelina Love is out of TNA/Impact Wrestling.

Posted on July 2, 2012 by stuntgranny

According to her Twitter account, Angelina Love is no longer part of TNA or Impact Wrestling. She hasn’t been seen in months after the terribly long, boring and nonsensical storyline of her becoming Winter’s zombie but not totally a zombie.

To all my wonderful fans, just want to let you know I have been granted my release from TNA. It was completely amicable parting of ways and I want to thank TNA and all of its employees for the wonderful journey I’ve had there over the years. Now I’m on to the next amazing chapter of my life! If you are looking to book me please contact John at john@spectacularsignings.com Thank you so much!

This isn’t a terrible loss as it was the first time she was released by TNA due to visa issues. Love was at one point one of their most important stars. Along with Velvet Sky they formed one of TNA’s only in house star making groups. They then proceeded to tear it down and build it up and then tear it down again for no real reason. No one has come out better for it and it dried up a revenue stream for TNA. So congrats to that Dixie.

Anyway, you have to figure she is dropping the porn name and will return to Angel Williams for her independent bookings. Wait, Angel Sky isn’t that bad of a name really but this isn’t Hentai so never mind. -Jeremy

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Kevin’s Blog: A Day Late & A Dollar Short Review of #iMPACTWrestling

Posted on April 6, 2012 by stuntgranny

Read below if you want the fun stuff from this week. I’ll keep the depressing stuff off of my introductions. Who wants to hear that? We’ve all got enough of that. Let’s roll.

I’ve finally set my DVR to record an extra five minutes during this show. Hulk Hogan gets the first intro from Dixie Carter because he didn’t get enough air time last week. He books a match between Crimson & Matt Morgan for Lockdown. Hogan sets up a women’s championship challenge who will take on Gail Kim. Hogan trades insults with Ric Flair who doesn’t have a mic. Bobby Roode shows up late with his scruffy looking security team. Roode tries to tell Hogan off but he puts the brakes on it. Roode has to wrestle Mr. Anderson. Hogan then books Jeff Hardy vs Kurt Angle next. Hogan proved me wrong. He got down to business with that segment.

I’m digging Angle’s new tights, more specifically the “Angle” on the leg portion that looks and is colored like the Olympic rings. Jeff Hardy started on offense. Kurt Angle got control before the commercial break. Good place for the match to be in. Hardy takes back over after the break. Triple suplexes by Angle. I’ve always dug the top rope belly to belly over head suplex from Angle. It should really end a match sometime. Hardy started a low blow. Good for him. Who doesn’t know that’s coming from a heel who just held a ref as a shield? Angle leaves. They stopped at a good time. Angle & Hardy could have a better match. Hogan is backstage and informs Angle he has a cage match at Lockdown with Jeff. Ric Flair talks to Eric Bischoff. That’s how informative it was. Bully Ray changes his name to Calfzilla. He says he’s the next world champion. Bully Ray is going to take out Austin Aries.

Bully Ray has eaten some large chicken wings. Austin Aries comes out. Aries shushs him then assaults him with a mic. Aries ends up power bombed after punching Ray in the head. Joseph Park is looking for Abyss still.

(more…)

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Kevin’s Blog: Almost Live, Definitely Half Assed Review of #iMPACTWrestling

Posted on March 1, 2012 by stuntgranny

I'm at the middle of the show and completely confused by everything happening and not in a good way either.

I’ve got nothing for an opening today. I’m tired but ready to bang out this review. Let’s roll.

Jeremy had a great line about Sting. Bobby Roode made him so mad, he was going to start going around everywhere in black face. So wish I had thought of that one. Evidently Kurt Angle is going to tell us multiple reasons why he attacked Jeff Hardy. My guess is that Jeff stopped supplying him with vitamins, cough cough. Kurt brings out cue cards. At least he’s not hiding his note cribbing like the Rock. Unlike the Rock, Angle is in no way electrifying. Just like the Rock, his promo sucks. He calls out Hardy. Jeff slaps him then double legs him. TNA loves officials from the back. Bobby Roode is still the “IT Factor of professional wrestling”. Ask the Miz how much that matters. Austin Aries wonders in. He says indirectly he tweeted something but not what he wrote. Excellent way to craft a promo. If you’re a moron. They talk a walk together because we can’t get enough of fighting authority figures in wrestling today. (That’s a huge dose of sarcasm.)

Daniels & Kazarian come out for the gauntlet match against AJ Styles. Ah, if AJ wins he gets to know why Kazarian turned on him. Why didn’t Daniels order Kazarian to be the first in the match? Kazarian can just lay down now. He still doesn’t like being controlled. They went to commercial break early. Kaz gives AJ his finisher to DQ Daniels but then pins AJ. Daniels looks confused. In a way, I don’t blame him but the main point is not giving out the info. Madison Rayne tries to impress Gail Kim with a bunch of pictures. Gail got them a day at the spa and a match against ODB.

Kim comes out with Madison for the match. Not a fan of the heel vs heel. ODB brings Eric Young to the ring with her. Madison Rayne stopped a bronco buster with a boot to the cooch. EY distracts the ref while his woman is winning. ODB gets the win when Kim can’t interfere? They argue again. Bully Ray berates the make up lady. Roode & Aries make the pitch to get rid of Sting to him. Velvet can barely complain about being screwed before Angelina & Sarita attack her.

They come back from commercial and Velvet Sky is complaining again. She was screwed by Madison. The screwing stops now. Then they replay what they did before the break. Excellent work morons. Weakest assault ever. Mickie James makes the save in the strangest outfit ever. She’s gone 80′s neon. Ric Flair yells at Garrett Bischoff. They want Garrett to come to his sense still. For some reason, Flair, Gunner & E Bisch think they can continue to beat down Garrett. Ground Hog Day something fierce.

(more…)

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TNA Audio #6 – The Ghost Of Big Dick Dudley

Posted on February 19, 2012 by stuntgranny

Silly babyface, champagne is for heels.

This week, Dusty and Matt focus on the February 16 edition of TNA Impact Wrestling. This is a very special Impact, because it just so happened to fall on Dusty’s birthday. Did TNA celebrate Dusty’s birthday properly? Well, you can find out by listening to this audio as our intrepid heroes delve into such topics as:

-Why do fat ECW alums have such great calves?

-So Cal Val must have used her stroke backstage with the powers to be because she appeared on this episode no fewer than two times!

-Who exactly was that MMA announcer jabroni and why was he being interviewed by Christy Hemme?

-Why is it that Brandon Jacobs is tougher than any wrestler in the locker room?

And a whole lot more stuff about a show that they both enjoyed, in an audio replete with Under Siege and Daria references for your entertainment, and it’s only going to cost you about an hour of your time, so if you have a heart at all, you’ll wish Dusty a happy happy birthday by downloading this bad boy immediately.

Stunt Granny TNA Audio Show #6

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Kevin’s Blog: Almost Live, Definitely Half Assed Review of #iMPACTWrestling

Posted on January 26, 2012 by stuntgranny

Velvet Sky is the latest to steal this iconic design.

We get review from last week then a brawl between Jeff Hardy and Bully Ray. A brawl to start this show is almost as predictable as the WWE starting with a 10-15 minute yapfest. Jeff just used a short broom. Kind of like the short bus he took to school. Nice to know there’s a storage room with all of Abyss’s goodies in it. Naturally, Bobby Roode is the only person to pull up and see this brawl happening. James Storm‘s Spidey Sense must have been tingling to let him know that Jeff was in trouble. Sting must have Spidey Sense too. He shouldn’t be attacking anyone anymore.

Velvet Sky, Tara and Mickie James are in a three way dance for a title shot. I honestly thought Mickie earned that last week. We get a commercial before much of anything happens. Wow, Tara wins after using Velvet to nail Mickie with a side slam sandwich. That was surprising. They could have used to hype her more recently. Gail Kim brags for a bit. It’s just weird that she’s looking away from the camera. I was fine with the message.

We get a replay of the opener. I hate this quick of a replay no matter what league. Hardy looks to be in really good shape. Not sure he’s ever been this toned up. Sting calls out Roode & Bully Ray. They have a mini-brawl that Sting breaks up. I can handle that. Of course the imaginary line doesn’t work. They need to get better at teasing what might happen on the show unless it was announced the week before. Tag team tables match is our main event. Alex Shelley says that Zima Ion isn’t up to snuff yet. Alex is more polished but Zima will get there if he keeps working.

(more…)

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TNA Audio #2 – The Road To Nowhere

Posted on January 22, 2012 by stuntgranny

If you don't listen, Dusty will do next week's audio wearing a turkey suit!

Oh my god, they renewed the contract for another week! By George, maybe this is catching on after all. This week, Dusty and Matt focus on the January 19 edition of Impact. Topics include but are not limited to these exciting things:

-The debut of the segment sweeping the nation, “Ask A Random Question.”

-More long diatribes about how no one in this godforsaken company knows how to dress himself.

-How exactly is mental retardation supposed to be funny?

-How many different ways can they come up with to end the show with a dirty finish?

Stunt Granny TNA Audio Show #2

And a whole lot more, and it’s only going to take about an hour of your time, so you need to listen or else you’ll be the only one in neighborhood who’s not, and no one wants to be the outcast.

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Kevin’s Blog: Almost Live, Definitely Half Assed Review of #iMPACTWrestling

Posted on January 19, 2012 by stuntgranny

My schedule feels like this bus.

So my schedule is busy already but when you toss in going to see the Bluejackets (Hey they actually won!) on your only day off during the week, it feels even more jam packed than normal. Next week will not be any better with my buddy Mittan coming from Altoona PA for the Machine Head show next Tuesday. I’m pumped for it. Speaking of Tuesday events, Smackdown is coming back to Cbus on March 13th so far warning on spoilers on Twitter and the site in general. Let’s roll.

I’m glad they’ve already given me something to FF thru with the review of Bobby Roode & Jeff Hardy. James Storm is going to whoop Roode’s ass at the PPV. Of course we get Hardy. They need the heel to weasel out of the championship. Three way dance I’d imagine since Sting is buddy buddy with the baby faces. They barely start to argue when Roode comes out. That solidifies what is going to happen at the PPV. Ah, a number one contender’s match. I like that better. Three way dances are dumb.

Angelina Love challenges Eric Young. The Knockout’s division is so much better than the Divas. (That’s sarcasm.) Gunner takes on AJ Styles. What did AJ do to deserve this? Ric Flair makes love to Gunner’s ear. A decent match is of course going to get ruined when Daniels & Kazarian arrive. I’d think that a couple of legit wins would help Gunner more as a killer. Magnus is ready for Crimson when he wonders into the shot. Their promo style is terrible. I don’t feel special or like it’s an inside look.

Bully Ray says he deserves a title shot because he’s been undefeated. Sting defends his ground. If he keeps doing the “Me boss, you employee” Crimson takes on Magnus. Taz is worried about Crimson being a single’s wrestler. Hilarious line of logic in a bad way. Crimson beats him in no time flat. They’re challenging for the titles, at least let him look good. For crying out loud. Samoa Joe attacks Crimson. Why would Morgan not be waiting by for this to happen? He finally makes the save. You still could have done this beat down but Magnus needed to look better. Eric Young is wondering if he can be in Bellator. Even the caterer actor is terrible. EY doesn’t wrestle women. ODB tells him to man up. ODB solicits EY but he’s too dumb to know it.

(more…)

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TNA Audio #1 – Me Hamburglar. You Low Rent Champion.

Posted on January 15, 2012 by stuntgranny

Look at that wacky guy, he's just so wacky!

This is a momentous occasion for Stunt Granny, as it is the inaugural edition of the uncreatively named TNA Audio Show! Every week from now until we get bored of the concept, we will do a full length audio running down the weekly happenings of TNA Impact Wrestling. This edition focuses on the January 12 episode of Impact. Contained herein includes:

-Who the hell is Matt Fanatic and why is he co-hosting an audio on Stunt Granny?

-An in-depth examination of the outfits worn by Sting, Bobby Roode, James Storm, Christy Hemme and others.

-What TNA is doing right and what TNA is doing wrong (hint: a bunch of stuff, but not as much as you might expect).

-Why *should* people pay 34.95 for TNA’s PPVs?

-The debut of the Family Feud segment – who were the three ugliest women on the show this week?

And a whole lot more nonsense, so if you got the stomach for it go ahead and give it a listen. You’ll get a free lollipop!

Stunt Granny TNA Audio Show #1

Filed under: Audio Updates, TNA Audio Show | Tagged: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a Comment »

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